change

2006-10-28T21:12:00.000-07:00

i have converted...

to livejournal.

Why? Because i'm bored of blogger. 3 YEARS PLUS OKAY PAT SINI. takkan sampai tua nak dok sini kan!!But , i wont shut down this palce , so i can view my own archives. Muahahaha. And also JUST in case I decide to come back. But till then , Its ELJAYYY for me.

http://blisstick.livejournal.com

relink me!!!

2006-10-28T04:47:00.000-07:00

[bitchyrant]
I know this isn't any of my business , but really I am getting extremely irritated with all those posts that says "I'm not in the mood for raya..." "this year raya no feeeling."

I've been reading this in like 90318312908312903193 blogs and I know it isnt any of my business to comment. BUT seriously , WHATEVER GUYS. Don't be such a brat! You have a family , you have baju raya , you have a home , you get duit raya , you get to eat ketupat rendang on your first day , your houses are beautiful. No mood? KAHWIN KAN KORANG NGAN DATUK K BARU TAU. tak bersyukur.

And all these posts sound like this.

I'm in no mood for raya this year. BUT HEYYYYYYYY , i'm STILL posting pictures of my pretty self in awesome raya clothes , with my family and my kuih raya and everything. Now , I know i look very happy in these pictures. But really, its all just an act.I just dont feel it this year.

You should just go give all your baju rayas, duit rayas ,pretty homes to all those people who cant afford it and will appreciate it.

All these teenagers ahh. Sometimes when parents restrict them , or when they have hwk to do , they say they want to ENJOY THEIR LIFE.
But what i realise is , TEENAGERS nowadays have all the things that they CAN enjoy. But they just refuse to do so.

BRATS.

Okay i've typed my say. So for all those that disagreee.

Your whiny non-unappreciative crybaby opinion would be.....?

[/bitchyrant]

Raya is awesome for me every year despite the tears and everything (long story). GOTTA LOVE WHAT YOU HAVE.

Anyhows , Puteri Gunung Ledang is a beautiful movie if you're watching it for the 3rd or 4th time and understand the concept of the movie. So yes , watching the movie on suria today was entertaining. Although i wanted to punch the screen during the final 30 minutes of the movie.

See the story goes like this , the sultan cursed the princess that anyone that sees her after the following dawn break will die a horrible death , hence she will live alone on top on mount ledang forever. So .. the princess goes back to the moutain like a good girl awaiting her lover.

Her lover , Mr Hang Tuah here , was still out in bloody nowhere. Prime minister and his gang goes up to meet him. A normal person would have said to Hang Tuah , " OI GET YOUR ASS TO GUNUNG LEDANG RIGHT NOW ! NOW NOW NOW!!" . But the prime minister is not a normal person.

Instead , he brings Hang tuah to some random wooden hut. I have no idea where the hut came from or who built it. But yarr..

Okay , whatever makes him happy. I dont mind. But we're running short of time here , so please make the explaination fast. But does he listen... NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. Instead he talked about fate , love , sultan melaka , his grandfather , his postman.Then at long last he asks Hang Tuah to "GO! go to gunung ledang"

Now any audience who is as rational as me would have been like "its about time , NOW GO! RUN RUN RUN!" But alas , Hang Tuah doesn't go. He gives a sniff first .. then helds out his hand. Then hugs the prime minister for a gazillion years. I was like.

DUDE, YOU HAVE A MOUNTAIN TO FREAKING CLIMB!

So after the oh-so-unneccessary hug , Hang Tuah finally runs. Run through forests , to the waterfall , through the semak samun , through the everything.

Hang Tuah has a really awesome stamina.

I was sad at the ending and all that. But it truly would not have happened if Hang Tuah had run at an earlier time.

2006-10-25T05:47:00.000-07:00

Liyana told me Nadia called her 3 nights ago laughing her ass off. Why?

Because Nadia called me while I was sleeping the other night and if you guys didnt know already I am not myself when I'm sleeping. So needless to say I spoke to her to a topic entirely irrelevant to what she was saying. According to nadia , when she asked me ,

Her: Sok mass takbir kol braper?
Me: Uhhh.. Air oren belom sampai.

I didnt even remember Nadia calling me.I remembered Shairah and Ashraff calling me on the same night though. And I'm sorry if my mumblings sounded incoherent. But seriously , you DONT want to hear me when I just woke up.

Hoho.

On another note ,aftermath of the bunga api and mercun playing on the field in front of ghufran made me welcome raya in high spirits. There's nothing more satisfying than to blow things up and watch sparkly shiny things fly up to the sky.

and to hear Zikry shout "TERBAKARRR... AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!! TERBAKARRR!!! AHHHH!!! TERBAKAR TERBAKAR!!" like a woman when they accidentally set the "trespassers beware" signage on fire.

Me and Liyana couldnt stop laughing. HAAHHAHAHA.

Went to sembahyang raya and nothing sounds more calming than hearing the takbir over and over again and watching the amount of people going to the mosque. It was A LOT i tell you. A much better sight to watch rather than the old kroogers that unshamedly eat and drink at the hawker centres during ramadhan.Dah tua kutuk pon tak nak insaf.

And all these mats , minahs ,pakciks who complain kita stare stare pat dorang bila dorang tak puasa.

Oh i'm SORRYY , were you supposed to be invisible?

Fatayaats jalan raya is on the 11th. And those people that I expected to disagree with the idea of jalaning raya without the boys did disagree (While others are overjoyed of a girls outing).

Okay lorrr.. After you think of how to fit about 70 over people in an SBS bus and to keep boy-girl mixing under control outside the mosque and to think of how to fit everyone's houses in one day , then you set up date and plan.

If can I also want (HELLOO , i would get to see him in baju kurung. Mesti hensem giler) .

Aiyohh but tak kluar ngan laki tak mati kan. and dont worry lah , mesti ada fityan outing as a whole , cuma tinggal orang nak plan jer.

Anyway , Selamat Hari Raya Semua!!

::sometimes I feel broke inside, but i wont admit:

2006-10-17T22:21:00.000-07:00

i think im going on hiatus until end of ramadhan.

i think.

2006-10-12T10:28:00.000-07:00

Ghufran's office under the hands of ruthlessly messy youths.

And boys , we would really appreciate it if you dont hide the girls' shoes and put cucumbers in them.

2006-10-10T09:27:00.000-07:00

Decided to remove the song because .. Emo is SOOO not my thing.

I'm fine by the way.

Anyway ,today I found out that it is much better to do my terawih prayers under the fan than under the air-conditioner. Though ,they do say that air-conditioners makes an environment conducive.

Yes, conducive enough to SLEEP!

2006-10-08T09:12:00.000-07:00

Duhai bonda duhai ayahanda
Dengarlah rayuan anakanda
Yang jauh di mata

Tanpa ku sedari airmata ku mengalir
Terdengar ayat suci seruan takbir
Betapa daku gembira dekat di samping keluarga
Di pagi mulia hari raya

Kan ku sujud di kakimu bila kita bertemu
Kan ku cium tangan mu ku pohon restu
Oh maafkan daku kesalahan diri ku

Walau jauh di mata namun kau tak dapat ku lupa
Doa ku sepanjang masa agar kau bahagia
Ku pohon restu dari mu oh ayah dan ibu
Agar tercapai cita ku membela nasib mu

Kesalahan diri ku...

I wanted to bold some lines of the song to highlight the ones that exactly tells what im feeling. Then I realised i bolded the whole song.

A million tears I can cry and it still wouldnt make a difference.
and that made me cry even more.

Oh dont mind me. I'm always emo like this, towards hari raya.

I have feelings too you know

2006-10-06T11:06:00.000-07:00

I just had a really really stressful day. Was close to tears most of the time and that's really saying a lot ohkayyyyy. Given the fact that i almost always never cry in times of crisis . Furthermore a certain "F" word keeps popping up in my mind . Which is again, saying a lot because I'm not really a swearing person in real life.In fact I cant even remember the last time I swore , except for a few entries back which wasnt really swearing if you think abt it.

One of the many reasons why today sucked was that I woke up late for an afternoon class. Woke up at 2.30pm. I admit , Im not exactly a morning person. BUT 2.30 PM ?!?! Some anak dara i am.

I totally panicked because i my assignment was incomplete and today was the deadline . No assignment , no grades equals to sucky gpa AGAIN. And worse of all , the day before ,I stupidly gave away my last 10 dollars on a random stranger who had no money to go home , so I had no money to get a cab just now. I can see liyana shaking her head right now.

But really LIYANA, it was late at night and she seemed really nice and I had no small change. So I gave her the 10 bucks.

So anyway my first idea was to call Nassier. Since he has a motor ,he can send me money for a taxi ride. Then i found out he was still at camp.He suggested that I asked money from my mother.

.....

OH WOW , why didnt i think of that....

Oh wait , now I remember why.

I DONT LIVE WITH HER ANYMORE.

Hahah.So yar ,a hell lot of trouble i went through just to get to school. So life taught me two lessons today

"Raudah , you can be generous and nice. But for god's sake , be generous and nice with your brains"

and

"Use alarm clocks at all times"

However I met up with the very much loved TEMASEK CLIQUE and chatted with Nassier on the phone (even though we actually promised that we wont talk on e phone during ramadhan. *Feels guilty*) , so the day wasnt all that bad.

Though if anyone wants to give me a big comforting hug , you're free to do so.

2006-10-04T11:09:00.000-07:00

Blogging at 2 am in the morning because i've just got back my semestral results and am beyond depressed. So blogging is my much needed theraphy.

Met up with fatin and hidayah today because i needed help with my assignment. As usual , hidayah launched into a whole series of complaints about being in meridian jc.

About how she and fatin are becoming less malay by the day.I dont know how that could have happened , but its kind of true. I seemed to not be able to converse to them in malay at all today. Its automatic.

And there's the mjc open house hidayah wants me to go to.

hidayah: you coming for mjc open house?
me: no.whatever for?
hidayah: Come and see , the fake happy life of meridians.

-_-

I dont know whether i have dramatic friends or mjc really is that bad. Haha.

Shairah on one fine day : Raudah , I swear to you , mjc is sucking and draining out every single ounce of happiness and life inside of me.

and

Faizal: When you tell a joke in mjc , you're like a real hero. They will all laugh like they've never heard a joke in their entire life.
Me:it can't be THAT bad. Surely not EVERYONE in mjc is like that.
Faizal: Actually yar not everyone
Me: SEE.
Faizal: There are some that are beyond redemption. They wont even recognise the joke.
Me: OHKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

Yes he actually used the phrase "beyond redemption".

Hidayah also claims that she actually became a nicer person in mjc because no one ever gets her sarcasm. So she stopped using them.

I bet she misses qazim right now.

2006-10-02T22:07:00.000-07:00

I told you they were sensitive.

Yes , a point to take note for every single person with a brain. If you dont want to read generalisations..then dont freaking read blogs.

An advice from an experienced blogger and blog-hopper.

You're not going to see an entry in any blog that begins with .

"This entry is dedicated to johnny , bobby , mickey and petom..... THEY ARE ALL FULL OF BULL"

Unless the blog-owner is a bitch. We generalise so we dont mention names.We generalise because we dont think humiliating someone in the cyber world is a nice thing to do.

For example , I've received a tag that commented something about generalisations after my previous entry.

WTH YOU MEAN YOU DIDNT KNOW THAT BLOGGERS USE GENERALISATIONS FOR MOST OF THEIR ENTRIES.
HELOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO are you retarded?

Tell me how many smokers there are in the world.Am I supposed to blog about every single type of smoker there is , just so you wont cry on your bed at night?

Well since you dont have a brain , and im a nice person , I explain to you the situation. Just because I feel negatively of smokers does not mean that i hate ALL the smokers in the world. (Nassier is a smoker and he is still my favourite person in the world.) Just because I blogged about how smokers are sensitive , does not mean ALL smokers are sensitive. Just because I say they had bad breath does not mean they ALL have bad breath.

DO YOU THINK I HAVE THE ENERGY AND TIME TO ANAYLYSE ALL THE STUPID RETARDS IN THE WORLD? Do you want an accurate summary of every single smoker behaviour in this world? if you do then...

THEN GO READ A DUCKING BOOK and get the hell out of here .

2006-09-28T22:38:00.000-07:00

Went jogging yesterday night from 9.30 till 10.40 at seashell park with the istighfar people. And thanks to them , I went home dreading to sleep alone in my bedroom . I HATE GHOST STORIES . I made huda sent me home and up the lift but the guys followed as well. I think they were guilty.

THEY SHOULD BE.

They should know that raudah has an extremely wild imagination.

The windows to my computer room has a translucent feel to it. Means I can see the sillohuete of the people outside. And UNLUCKILY enough for me , my neighbour walks like a zombie.Seriously. She doesnt walk past my window.

SHE APPEARS TO BE FLOATING BY.

Well at least , i THINK its her.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

so anyway , after yesterday's pocong stories. My imagination became wilder. I was typing away at my computer to finish my data entry thing , and suddenly my brain painted a picture of a pocong hopping past my translucent windows!

it was so real that i quickly shut down the computer , went to to iman's bedroom , locked the door and slept underneath the blanket beside my 5-year-old bed wetting cousin.

Well come to think of it. IF I DID WET MY BED out of fright .. i can always blame him. im a genius

So yeah. Back to the jogging story. We were all doing warm-ups and muzakkir was doing this crunches thingy. AND SUDDENLY . he gave this sound that unmistakbly was a fart.

i was like what the duck. and he was like

"eh. terkentut"

HAHAHAHAHAH. i laughed non-stop sia.

Anyway , my bitchy mode is on. So here goes a whole entry dedicated to smokers.

[the person who inspired me to wrote this has apologised. so no hard feelings.its ramadhan anyway. This is just a entry for the OTHER smoking population.]

I'm getting sick of this okay. How smokers usually are SOOOO damn bloody sensitive if we touched on the subject of smokers. What? Do i have an obligation to be NICE to smokers? DO YOU DIE IF I MENTION SMOKING TO YOU.

dude. you are dying with every PUFF.

Surely you can handle this blow of words.

I dont understand WHY , every comment I say seems to be a personal attack and NOT a word of advice. What?this is the wrong way to advise people?

WELL have you guys saw a smoker advise someone. I HAVE.

*smokes a ciggaratte* Boy jangan start smoking *puffs out smoke* .. Tak bagus .. *Inhales*

ironic? no?

People who think smoking is the right way to handle stress , peer pressure or curiosity thinks I handle things the wrong way?!

irony at its best..

See. They keep telling me its difficult to quit. YES people ,I do know that. I'm not stupid. THAT was the ducking reason why people like me dont start smoking. THAT is the ducking reason why im not in YOUR position. So excuse me for not understanding your pain.

and I HATE IT when guys who smokes says they hate girls who smoke. It pisses me the hell off (even when HE says it )

YOU THINK YOU DESERVE GIRLS WHO DONT SMOKE?

you dont .

and dont you dare say that I am opening your flaws too to the whole world. DONT YOU DARE.. Unless you smoke in secret , you have NO bloody right to say that. YOU BOYS ARE NOT EXACTLY MASTER OF MYSTERY when it comes to smoking. Seriously.

The reason I wrote this entry is because I AM SICK of smokers who are too damn sensitive. If your lungs can take in that toxins every day , THEN TAKE IN THIS.

I HAVE NO BLOODY RESPECT FOR SMOKERS . I HAVE NO BLOODY RESPECT FOR PEOPLE WHO WASTES THEIR OWN AND PARENTS' MONEY. I HAVE NO BLOODY RESPECT FOR PEOPLE WHO DESTORYS THE BODY THAT GOD HAS GIVEN TO THEM. I DONT GIVE RESPECT FOR PEOPLE WITH BAD BREATH.

So either you quit OR freaking deal with my words you smoke exhaling babies.

2006-09-24T22:52:00.000-07:00

They JUST had to show that footage on the first episode of warna ramadhan. In which , neither I nor my family watched.

So now , no one gets to watch my debut appearance on tv. *grumbles*

except for Fatin and Alia. Fatin who immediately informed me on the phone , "OMG RAUDAH , I JUST SAW YOU ON TV" . Which made me shriek extremely loudly in public. -_-

On another note ,

I am famous.

Even suaibah's mum recognised me. Yesterday after terawih I salam-ed her and she actually said "oh this is the girl that was on tv right?"

CHEHWAHHHHHHHHHH.

Anyhows , Fatin and alia told me i spoke quite fluently in malay. Which is actually quite not what happened. I was interviewed and i was shaking and blabbering like mad. The guy behind the camera was very intimidating okay. So yes , liyana thinks they actually edited a lot to make me look good. And my mother being the most supporting mother in the world told me that they probably edited out my voice and put someone else's voice entirely.

She just doesnt want to accept the fact that her daughter IS cool.

Anyway , if there is any soul out there that actually tapes warna ramadhan. You just became my new best friend.

*grins*

2006-09-23T09:42:00.000-07:00

For some reason , my friendster profile have had more views ever since i've put this picture as my primary pic.

And ive been told , i resemble a lalat (fly) . Thank you . I think its flattering that you think i remind you of that stupid irritating insect that flies from dustbins to dustbins.

really.

Anyway Liyana is going to jump of the building after she reads this. But I dont care ,im still going to say it anyway.

I think she's in love.

With an ustaz.

SMS CONVERSATION:
liyana: OMG , the ust is like super hot lah!
me: Ustaz aper? where are you?!
liyana: at **-**** mosque lah. THE UST IS HOT HOT HOT
me: You're supposed to meet me today. I need to pass something to you
liyana: Lahh. slm kt nk atker
me: Eh , you sms while checking out the ust is it? spelling dasyat.
liyana: OMG! HOW YOU KNOW. the ust is so hot. so hot . so hot.

Liyana..

he is wayyyyyyy out of your league

=P

Kiter kasi kak aishah ah! set?

2006-09-21T09:13:00.000-07:00

I decided to take up a new job.

No dont snort into that coffee. Im serious.

My job is to transfer a whole lot of crap into microsoft excel for Singapore Post. Bassically my job is to sit in front of the computer all day and supress my need to fulfil my chatting needs. So yeah , for those people on msn whom i ignored or dissed.

Sorry but ive got A JOB to do.

PUNYER MELUAT. haha

Anyway I'm not sure what they call people who do this job. Data-entry-person maybe. I hope they have a cool name for it , like Daterny or something. Then i can tell everyone that I'm a "DATERNRY"

uhh..

yeah

Anyway , this job is kind of easy. Except for the fact that some human beings have the writings of a RETARD. It really pisses me off sometimes.

i get into the rhythm of typing really fast and suddenly i go to this paper where the person writes like SH*T and i have to spend about 15 minutes on the paper.

Which is why im blogging in the first place. I kinda got frustrated on this guy who wrote in extremely thin strokes. So now his name on my microsoft excel file is ,

TAUA TIAON KAITEIE

I don't know whether its because i really can't read his handwriting or he really has a weird name.

LIKE WHO THE KUNTET NAMES THEIR SON , TAUA TIAON KAITETIE.

I bet he grew up to be a freak.

HAHA. if this guy ever type his name on google , he'd probably land up in my blog and i'd be so TOAST.

SORRY ARR BRADER, i joking only lah brader.

And you know what , this guy send " DVD 9 VCD " to someone from KIRIBATI.

like ..

KIRIBATI.

that's it! THAT'S GOING TO BE MY DAUGHTER'S NAME.

Nurul Kiribati Bte Nassier Bin Serunding (Sarudin) bin idunnowhat

hmm. For short.. i can call her kiri or bati or ribati. I'm so spoilt for choice!

My initial plan was to bitch about some makciks2 who are so sombong nak mampos.BUT .. Now im too lazy. Maybe next entry.

2006-09-19T01:55:00.000-07:00

MY WEEKENDS WAS A BLAST.

all thanks to fityan ghufran.

Orientation on Saturday , with the new batch of cool kids.
And RYC launch on Sunday.

I feel nothing but utter affection to the new members who not only makes me want to hug them with their enthusiasm , but also gives me the feeling that they really love being part of fityan. *GIVES EVERYONE A BIG HUG*

and to them : I ensure you , that your days as a fityan member would be the best days of your life. And no matter who you are , where you're from , we will still welcome you with open arms.

I really think that our family is becoming bigger and bigger. Serious. Just yesterday I was walking around tampines and everywhere i go I see a fityan member.(ewanny , amelia , khadijah , hanis , nabila , faizal , izy.. ETC) and I just feel so happy everytime i meet one. Because they're also seemed so happy to see me.

Anyhows some photos on the night of ORIENTATION THE MAKING. hoho

muka alien part 2

this entry was written in a rush (im late for ngaji) so yeah.. no sarcastic remarks this time.

2006-09-14T08:01:00.000-07:00

I feel like writing a bitchy entry.Just for the fun of it.

You know what . Humans are stupid.
Yes. We have a brain , but sometimes we say stuffs like we dont.

things i dont understand about humans #1 -
Ever lost something and searched high and low for it and finally you give up and ask your maid or your friends whether they've seen it. "Have you seen my keys?"

Ever had them reply "Nope. Where did you put it?"

right up your nostril.

IF I KNEW WHERE I PUT IT , I WOULDNT BE ASKING YOU.
it seriously pisses me the hell off. Im already so frustrated that i can't find this thing, i seriously dont have time for stupidity.

things i dont understand about humans #2-

Those that blog for the sole purpose to tell the whole world how sucidal they are. I begin to lose faith in humanity by reading blogs. Seriously. I dont understand how a girl can feel so depressed just because their parents divorced , or had an arguement with them or whatever.

i'm not saying you cannot blog about them. No dont get me wrong , I find it quite an interesting read actually. I just dont think they should be like "OH MY LIFE IS SO UNFAIR" .. "i am the unluckiest person in the world" .. "Why does this happen to me?" or worse "why does this ONLY happens to me?"

Shit happens. Deal with it.

You ask , why does it happen to you. Why not you , you whiny bitch.

things i dont understand about humans #3

Why guys always complain about girls having blogs .Unthankful brats. For decades men have been complaining about not being able to comprehend us. And now , when we are giving you the priviledge to know what goes on in our head , you complain?

things i dont understand about humans #4

Why people have to say "My legs are too long , its fugly" and always complaining about them. AND YET... and yet.... they post pictures of themselves in shorts pants and skirts. For the whole world to see.

YAY! I HAVE UGLY LONG LEGS , LETS POST THEM ON THE INTERNET. WHEEEE

Contradicting , no?

things that i dont understand about humans #5

When guys say "This century its very hard to find a girl who is a virgin," and complain and complain and complain. i dont mind when decent guys says this. But most of the time i hear from the mats and the not so innocent ones.You know.. the ones.. that fuck around.

HELLLO , these girls didnt lose their virginity by fucking themselves. if they're not virgins anymore , its because of guys like you , you faggot.

things that i dont understand about humans #6

Why girls dont treasure their virginities anymore. Be sexy , katakan tidak!

things that i dont understand about humans #7

When muslims (Who are supposed to believe that Allah s.w.t create everything on earth) say "My body my problem ahh.." "my boobs my problem ahh" "my vagina my problem".

Yeah Im sure you made that vagina all by yourself.

things i dont understand about humans #8

Why , losers like me actually enjoyed blogging with utter bitchyness.

I should do this more often , no?

hahah , maybe not.

Anyway this entry wasnt directed to anybody in particular. Just humans in general. Like , you and you and you.

Not me though , Im an alien from planet zagorga.

2006-09-11T21:37:00.000-07:00

Just an announcement.

There will be an orientation for new members of fityan ghufran this saturday.So to all my friends and fellow bloghoppers , if you want to be part of us , this is your chance to register. Anything just contact me laughout_loud@hotmail.com through msn or email. Or tag at my board with your email address.

Anyhows , I just realised i have not posted pictures of the
Fatayaat's gathering.

BTW , fityan has male members. These pictures are just us girls on a day out.

2006-09-09T00:42:00.000-07:00

'What will your obituary say?' at QuizGalaxy.com

Great. Im going to die fat and lonely.

Fatin is soo lucky.

"Evilly skulking around the neighbourhood, Fatin died with an infected toenail. Fatin will be terrible missed by Mr. Potatohead."

At least Mr. Potatohead is going to miss her.

I dont even own a cat. Stupid quiz.

*sulks for the rest of the day*

2006-09-08T23:47:00.000-07:00

FINALLY , internet access! My modem was screwed up for the past two days , so that explains my absence. And because of this , I didnt get to read email from janice . Which means , I missed floorball practice today.

BLEAH.

im sooooooo not ready for floorball.

Anyhows ,Being the no lifer that i was , at about 12 am in the morning a few days ago i decided to kill the turtle trend and influence other ppl to put cats on their nick.

THE RESULTS

it was actually razali's idea.

Anyhows its not that i dont respect steve irwin , I just dont see the purpose of the turtle. I mean come one , this man battled fierce animals during his life. He probably thought turtles were gay.

I wonder if they kept the stingray that killed him. I think they should like put it in a zoo or something. Then they can label outside its aquarium "The murderer" .

See that's an idea.

Then they can put a female stingray inside it. And then they mate , and they breed and you can name the whole family , "The murderer generation".

Boost the tourism of the country a bit.

:: he said "you're the one for me" ::

2006-09-03T21:02:00.000-07:00

The only positive thing about of this all is that I can tell this to my mum and she never has to worry that I wont get married.

-_-

Anyhows , yesterday's YLN soccer tournament was a success. No denying that i was damn worried it would rain, but it turned out to be bloody scorching yesterday. And I was in charge of the scores in the morning. So I had to parade around the field , in front of 320 boys. Yes , 320 BOYS. no kidding. I mean the whole event was great and everything. CUCI MATER BEB.

But imagine if I fell flat on my face.

in front of 320 males.

not too cool.

Anyway I'm going to miss the organising committee. Especially Huda , my fellow secretary. Thanks for the interesting conversations. The late night walk around pasir ris central that night and sending me home after that. Let's hope for more event collaborations between istighfar and fityan ghufran.

and this time we organise netball tournament. AND HAVE ONLY 4 BOYS in the committee. hehehe. Dorang nyer turn plak jadi secretary ngan treasurer. HAHAHA.

BLEAH , i had a LOT of things to blogged about.But now my mind is just blank.

::i can resist everything except temptations::

2006-08-28T01:17:00.000-07:00

Sometimes children cheer you up and give you a sense of satisfaction that only they can give.

Usually when I leave the house i tell nabil and iman that i'm going off. Iman will say "bye kakak adah!!" . Nabil on his cranky moods would just ignore me. And sometimes just to piss him off i run around chasing him to give him a big hug before i go.

Oh , he loves me. He's just playing hard to get.-_-

On his happy days he'd come running to me and salam me. On this particular day he came to me and salam and gave me this extremely cute facial expression . I was like "Ahh.. aper buat muka cam gitu?" then when i came nearer...

rupanya dia nak cium pipi aku.

I spent the rest of my day smilling to myself.

Sayang jugak dia pat kakak adah dia. HEEEEEH. I am always argueing with him and trying to piss him off , but both he and i know that if i dont live here anymore , he's going to miss me. HOHO.

Today he threw a tantrum when my aunt told him he cannot eat his brother's birthday party food. And me being the good kak sedare that i am said "Nabil , you take yang kotak jelly tu , kita gi bilik sana kita makan sama-sama,"

HAHHA! My aunt was like "HOI , yang kau gi layankan si dekni buat aper."

My aunt whom i affectionally call "Mak" is like the most laser makcik you can ever find in singapore. I think when I grow up i'm going to be exactly like her. I love her anyway. If you ask me who are the 3 most important people in my life , it would me my mum , makni and mak. Mak comes over here to take care of nabil every day. I have grown immune to her laserness since young.

Nabil was searching for his brown plastercine this morning. We told him its gone but dia mati-mati still want to find it.

Mak: Mak tahu mana plasticine nabil.
Nabil: pat aner?
Mak: Nabil check pat nabil nyer sini *points to her nostril* Pat sini banyak

I couldnt stop laughing.

And on the subject of siti nurhaliza and datuk k...

Mak: Kau tak nak ke ngan datuk?
Me: EEEEEEEEEEEEE tak ingin sey
Mak: Ngan datuk kau tak nak?!
Me: TAK NAK AHHH . *Walks aways*
Mak: Si siti tu kahwin ngan datuk k , datuk kaya. KAU NANTI KAHWIN NGAN DATUK T , datuk tua!

HAHAHA basket.

And Hasana told me over lunch with me and rowhani the other day , something along the same lines. Her mum told her , "Si siti tu kahwin ngan Datuk K , datuk Kaya. kau kahwin ngan Datuk M (her bf's initial) , datuk Miskin!"

so people..

what did your mother said to you today?

::in your heart ,in your mind ,i'd stay with you ,for all of time::

2006-08-23T09:43:00.000-07:00

The previous post has been edited.

Due to personal reasons , I have decided not to be involved in a reliationship. We both know that we have feelings for each other but you see..

thats the problem.

Maybe later on in life , we'd meet again. But not now.
The right thing to do is always the hard thing to do.

Okay , I can so imagine Shairah's reaction "RAUDAH YOU ARE SUCH A PRUDE"

so maybe i am.

=D

the private photos feature on friendster thing is cool. Now can post private pictures of myself.

okay that sounded wrong.

2006-08-20T23:07:00.000-07:00

Watched the national day rally yesterday. Oh dont you act all surprised .I'm not as ignorant as you think. I watched the national day rally last year also OKAY.

But I tend to wonder random things while watching it. Like how long did it take Mr Lee to memorise his super bloody longspeech and HOW THE HELL HE DID IT. Or what happens if he has the urge to pee during the speech. Would he be like

"Excuse me singapore , nature is calling."

Or what if he gave out a really large fart. Would he be like "They didnt teach me how to hold it in ,at the University." Or , how long did it take him to figure out what to wear for the rally.

That kind of stuff.

Anyway The video of singapore in sand art gave me goosebumps sia. BLOODY AWESOME.

"Myspace is a place where you post your photos. and the photos make friends with each other."

THAT CRACKED ME UP.

2006-08-17T07:01:00.000-07:00

This is Md Zul Iman.Over the years I have develop a love-hate reliationship with him. But most of the time (when we're not arguing) he's just adorable. I teach him tuition twice a week at home. On his moody days , he is such a BLEAH to teach. Today.. wasn't one of those days. Hahah. Today he was in a good mood.

Him: Mouse is plural or singular.
Me: Singular. What is the plural of mouse?
Him: Ummm... rats.
Me: RATS?!

And we both laughed non-stop for about 5 minutes.

Him: Jujurawat tu aper?
Me: Jururawat , not jujurawat.
Him: Iman tau.. Jururawat .. pat muka kakak adah!
Me: TU JERAWAT LAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

-_-

kurang asam nyer budak. Time ajar tuition pon nak kutuk aku.

I want to watch the new hindustan movie !! The one with shah rukh khan and rani apertahjiji. Liyana the freak doesnt watch hindi movies. So now , I have no one to watch with.

BLEAH.

So if anyone want to watch the movie .. AJAK AKU!

maceh.

2006-08-12T23:33:00.000-07:00

The other day ,I accidentally. dropped two long john silver meals on top of kak aishah. Fries , oil , chicken and everything. So bloody embarassing. WHY do I keep doing these stuffs.I am like a walking tornado. I mean if I have a husband , I'd probably drive him nuts.

"Oh honey... Look at you , all dressed up in your white shirt and expensive pants. Here's your coffe- . OH . Guess , you'll just have to find another white shirt and expensive pants now."

Oh ya anyway , The whole long john silver was full with Mats and few sluts with them. Or maybe they were minahs. I dont know. See no difference. So yes , anyway , the minahs apparently found the whole situation very funny. So while Kak Aishah was clearing all those oil and chicken keraks of her chair and trousers . They were bursting out laughing as if it was the funniest thing in the world.And as if its not bad enough , they decided to say in the loudest voice possible "HAHAHAHA BODOHNYER.. HAHAHA BODOHNYER.. HAHA BODOHNYER. HAH BODOHNYER.. BODOHNYERR"

wide vocabulary. I know.

Anyway I guess it must been quite funny. BUT GEEZ , its not thattttttttt funny. How funny can a girl accidentally dropping food on her friend get? -_- Deprived sense of humour.Anyway none of the mats were laughing at me.In fact no one at Long John laughed except for the minahs.

Can you imagine going out with a minah. It'd be quite cool wouldnt it? She'd think you're a genius. They're not too difficult to impress. Just.. drop food on her skirt..

She'd laugh her ass off.

2006-08-05T09:50:00.000-07:00

"Tentang Dia" is such an emo movie. HAHA. Dont really know whether I liked it or not , but i watched it till the end. The heroine annoyed me though. ASYIK NANGIS JERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR.

The hero looks like shaiful.
or Shaiful looks like hero.=P CHEHWAH SHAI!

ANYWAY I think I hated the ending so much. The part where Gadis had this whole box of paper aeroplanes , which signified her memories or whatever. And then she threw them one by one down the goddamn high carpark or whatever. To the streets , city , people below or whatever.

SARDINE JER!

LIKE helloooooooooooooooooooooooooo.YOU ARE LITTERING , you idiot.

If you guys didnt know already , I hate to see people littering (Shairah and Hidayah has always been victims of my naggings). Its just a simple act of throwing something into the nearby dustbin. Don't be such a SINGAPOREAN. People always nyeh this nyeh that , saying they cannot see people in sadness or poverty or whatever. SAY ONLY.... Like sometimes dont you see some old nynoya or makcik sweeping the road. Or the old cleaners in school. Or the bangladeshi workers who came to find rezeki in Singapore for their own families.

THESE ARE THE PEOPLE PICKING YOUR LITTER. Your mess. I know any stupidshallowmindedstupidevilandnottomentionstupid people will say "they're paid to do this."

Imagine you are the cleaner and EVERYONE thinks like that.

What is so wrong about throwing your own litter in the dustbin. seriously.

See , Im nagging again.

Anyway whatever Ust Jamaludin said about the whole Lebanon war thingy was really super depressing. Cause now I feel like I dont have the right to be happy anymore.

BLEAH. this is reality i guess.

2006-08-02T21:29:00.000-07:00

Meet my mom (the one strangling iman in this picture). She , who is utterly shocked that a guy in this world is actually interested in me. They were right when they say parents are the ones that bring their children down to earth. But I think my mother didnt just bring me down to earth , she did a body slam.

"Dulu.. Punya susah nak dapat boyfriend...."

I told her that I DID capture the attention of some humans of the opposite sex . But I just did not want a reliationship. Hence , that's why I did not have boyfriends.

Dont you find it sad that I have to convince my mother that I am attractive.

Okay so maybe Im not thaaaaaaaaat attractive . BUT IM NOT REPULSIVE either (i think)! and you do realise that if I dont convince her... She'd think im incapable of getting my own boyfriend. And then , SHE'D FIND ME ONE.

*shudders*

So anyway i asked my mom "Bila pulak yang adah susah nak cari boyfriend. Secondary 2 ngan 3 adah ader involved with a few guys aper..Adah cuma tak stead ngan dorang jer."

"time primary school dulu takder pon.."

I think only my mother would think its normal for her daughter to be involved with a boy in primary school.

-_-

Anyway , I've been spending the past two days in ghufran. I've been redecorating the fityanghufran room. The place looks muchos better now okay. KAN LIYANA? hoho. But we used double sided tape for a lot of things , so I think by today everything's fallen apart.

The other day I went to ghufran with Liyana to do my maghrib prayers. It was 1st rejab that day so everyone was breaking their fast. And suddenly I can't wait for ramadhan! I miss miss miss the ramadhan atmosphere at ghufran.Going to terawih every night of the ramadhan with the girls.I remembered I was super-super depressed I couldn't do terawih on the first night .I remember we'd meet at the sports hall first and then we'd go to the mosque together. Like a routine.And the boys would be downstairs helping with the cleaning up. And occasionally we'd stay overnight at the masjid. And me and suaibah would borrow rashid and isak's bicycle and cycle around the neighbourhood at 2am in the morning , barefooted. And at about 4am we'd have our sahur together (sort of haha) , at the 24hr Macdonalds or get something from 7eleven.

This year hopefully things wont change. Sayang korang.

2006-07-30T22:43:00.000-07:00

OMG you know what I just realised. Hasanah is the queen of vague answers. She gives you this feeling like she answered your questions , but actually she didnt. Like if you ask her , what did she eat this afternoon. She'll answer you "I ate at macdonalds" .

Yesterday I had to wait for HASANH FOR ONE FRIGGIN HOUR because of this. First of all , she told me that she'll only be going out only after she did her project with Suaibah and Nadhirah. So I asked her "How long is it going to take?"

and she answers me , "its a discussion."

errrrrrrr... YAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.. HOW LONG?!?!

hahaha. idiot.

And when I was already reaching sports hall (our meeting place) I asked her where she was , cause i was reaching already. BUT DOES SHE tell me where she was. no , she tells me "I'm walking."

DFJKLASDJASKDASJD

like , so is the whole wide world.

Anyhows , Im finally going to post sane pictures of myself. YEAP I WILL.

Outing with the suffering jc geeks. =D

I had the most awesome time with them , last friday. Just like old times. I tell you , when you're with these bunch of people , you will laugh your friggin ass off.Hahah.

And we made these two strangers in the MRT to laugh at us. One of them was an indian teenager and the other was a malay lady. Both of them DIDN'T know each other. But they laughed WITH each other.

AT WHATEVER WE SAID!

it was soo bloody weird.

And when we alighted the MRT , we were like discussing about how we were being the subject of a common joke two strangers shared like really loudly . And then we realised the malay lady was right behind us.

HAHAHAHAHHA.

Yesterday's floorball barbeque was fun. Oh and dont ever play murderer with Hazirah and Ca Fong. HAHAHA. Hazirah either never dies when you wink at her , or she'll ask you "eh , you wink at me ah?" Ca Fong will die when you kill her but she'll scream bloody murder while looking at you and EVERYONE will know that you're the murderer. HAHA.

Coin game rocked. though I doubt I'd ever play it , except with Hidayah , Shairah , Alia , Fatin , Shida and Wani. haha.

Shida and Wani. YOU'RE MISSED.

2006-07-27T10:49:00.000-07:00

Before there was liyana

HAHAHAHAHAHHAHA!
Before you kill me , isa , i must let you know Liyana loves this picture.

Today's floorball training was Okay.. I really think im improving. LIKE FINALLY. But today there was this drill that I totally screwed up because i had no damn bloody confidence. Its the drill where 2 players at one time has to go and try to shoot. And after we got a little better coach put in 1 defender. AND HE PUT ME IN AS THE DEFENDER. Whadda- . Before that he took turns putting in all those great players like Janice , Pei Li , Afiqah .. So naturally when coach said my name I was like

....

I mean , all these players he put before me were good , so it was a challenge to pass through them. AND THEN HE PUTS ME IN. ME? As a challenge? I just felt so stupid when I let all those goals in. I dont know how to explain it , but it was because the rest were defending so well , so not a lot of goals went in. And then there was me , blur as a friggin sotong , letting A LOT of them in. So naturally I felt stupid.

But I think the coach was just trying to raise my confidence. Something that I DONT HAVE. I can't take rejection in sports very well. I know all those scoldings for seniors are for my own good , which is why , I dont take it personally. But i guess it sort of pulls me down. Because during games , I tend to think the seniors wont pass to me because they think I wont be able to get the ball. And when they do pass to me , I get so shocked I lose the ball.

This could be a problem.

Anyway I miss having P.E with 4/Unity! I miss all those crazy netball games we played. All the dirty tactics they used (they not me). HAHAH. I remembered Qazim would shake the netball pole when i tried to score. And there was this once Shairah pulled my shirt when I got the ball. VIOLENT SIA THAT GIRL.

And I miss napha test. I miss getting gold every year. I miss getting first for 2.4km run. Oh yar and I miss everybody wanting me in their netball team. HOHO .Bleah , i miss being regarded as good in sports , period. I dont want to think that because now, i wear tudung im more restricted in my movements when I play sports. But I guess its sort of true. I'm physically restricted because (I cannot move as freely and i can't see fully , because my tudung covers the sides etc etc). But that's not important , what's important is im not mentally restricted.I cannot keep thinking im at a disadvantage , because by that , I will be.

SO. *Takes our pompoms* You can do it raudah. You can do it. *Shakes*

Bleah , am i blogging or giving myself a self-motivation talk? Hahah , sorry I guess I just needed to let that all out.

2006-07-26T22:18:00.000-07:00

"Eh somebody should record you when you're on your own. Action nak mampos"

ajkldasdkasldjasdkasdjak. SERIOUS? serious? Serious?

No, im supposed to be loud and friendly!!

Somehow I managed to embarass myself in Century Square yesterday. Oh Yes , I did. I was looking at this really nice bead necklace which was hung on this display. And surprise surprise , I dropped the thing and the necklace tore itself away from the freaking tag!! I have no damn idea how that could have happened. So in panic i tried to put it back in its original place , but there were so many holes I didnt know how I could have done it , so I just left it there . But guess where the shopkeeper was?

RIGHT BEHIND ME.

Me: Hello *walks away*
Angry Shopkeeper: Thanks
Me: *Walks back * I SWEAR TO GOD , IT WAS WASN'T MY FAULT . I have no idea how it happened! *Walks away again*

I was still talking to the shopkeeper when I was walking away , so I didnt realise that Liyana was in front of me! So I accidentally stepped on her flip flop , causing her to almost fall flat on her face.

OH MY GOD. I AM CLUMSY!

::I want to marry a drunk pirate::Anyway I went to catch Pirates Of The Caribbean 2 the other day. OMG , is it me or is the movie unneccesarily gory. I CANNOT watch gory movies , okay. I get all squirmy. But besides the gore , the movie was great. But there's some moments where I laughed alone. BLOODY HELL SEY . The cinema was probably a full house and I was the only one who got the joke. Like the part where Jack said

"I love those moments , I like to wave at them as they pass by"

That was supposed to be funny! But I was the only one laughing. Tak shiok sey ketawa sorang. And the part where Jack told Elizabeth when she was getting on the ship that a woman either wear a dress or go naked on the ship .

"And it just so happens *pause* , we dont have any dresses on board *drunk grin*"

I WAS THE ONLY ONE WHO LAUGHED OUT LOUD AT THAT ! wtf. the whole world has no sense of humour. Either that , or I have a cikopek sense of humour.

Anyway can somebody please tell me why that huge monster is called , "the crack" ? I just dont get it.

And how many million references of RUM can you make in one movie.

2006-07-19T20:21:00.000-07:00

I am such a crybaby when Im sick.

and i look horrible.

2006-07-16T08:41:00.000-07:00

Fishball's birthday celebration.We ALL forgot to bring a cameraSo all these pictures were taken by our camera phones
I give out a really smelly fart
Nadia becomes confused
Nabilah waves it away
Nadhirah .. smells my fart
Liyana poses for the camera.

Nabilah tries to be Angelina Jolie.

Liyana is horny
Nadia Korek gigi
Nabilah beremosi
Suaibah ketawa sendiri
Nadhirah .. the usual face..

2006-07-16T06:56:00.000-07:00

I miss talking to my oh-so witty friends.

Hidayah: Why is everyone's life more interesting than mine? No drama happen to me
Me: Why do you ALWAYS say that
Fatin: hidayah , MAKE your life interesting.Go flirt with Johnny or something

HAHAH

Anyway Drama doesnt leave hidayah . Hidayah leaves the drama.

Fatin: anywayss, raudah, I think Bobo likes Umita. HOHO
Hidayah:who the hell is Bobo?
Me: WHAT
Me: SERIOUS?!
Me: NO U CANT BE SERIOUS
Me: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

owh man there goes my eyecandy.And no i wont tell you who Bobo is.

And to those who know. I know he doesnt exactly have the cutest face . But damn .... that body.

okay , what an inappropriate thing to say.

Anyway Happy birthday FISHBALL (liyana)
and happy belated birthday Megawati (hidayah)

::i want to cry till i get an answer::

2006-07-11T02:13:00.001-07:00

:: I shall disengage myself of all emotions. ::

HAH? Kalau kita kahwin dia nak aku pakai kain batik pat rumah?

...................

wtf.

NAK MAMPOS?

2006-07-08T07:24:00.000-07:00

Was tagged by nabilah. So im doing this again.

Say 7 weird and random facts about myself

1. I think its hot when someone give little or no information about them in their blogs. Like for introduction they just put 2 three words like "Beebee 18 years old" or they write as anonymous. For some reason I find it very mysterious and sexy. As for my blog , my introduction part , like biography. Because.. im not mysterious and sexy.

I should be though.

2. I have this habit of sleeping with a pillow on my head. I dunno why. I think if I dont put the pillow on my head , then at night I will see pontianak. Hopefully this habit does not continue when i get married. Cause you know.. its not really a cool thing to do.

3. I CANNOT sleep without my hp beside me. Because if the pillow on the head thing fails and i see a pontianak. At least I can call the police (or whoever). I AM SERIOUS about this.

4. When I was small I would always force my brother to play girly stuffs with me. Like , main kedai-kedai , cooking-cooking , barbie dolls all that. But I always play soccer with him , so its fair.

5. When I was small , I had a crush on Gurmit Singh and I wanted to marry michael jackson.

6. Sometimes I imagine myself being this really really wild havoc-giler girl. Smoking , turn lesbian , pierce belly button , go clubbing , wear baju seksi seksi .But then I realise the sexiest outfit i own is .. my school uniform . Some wild havoc-giler girl i would be. -_-

7. When Im alone , I sing sexy songs. HOHO. when i ironing my clothes i'd be like "Loosen up my buttons bebeh ...."
But as you can imagine when I sing , the songs suddenly tak sexy lagi.

Not tagging anyone because the whole wide world has done this before.

:: I dont lie . I contradict ::

2006-07-07T09:52:00.000-07:00

.NabilahRaudah..

"I didnt say you did it. I just said I was going to blame you. "

2006-07-06T07:33:00.000-07:00

rap: rhythmic speaking
hip-hop: musical porn

Hoho.

I decided to update this blog after all. This is my very much needed theraphy from all the crap assignments i must do.

Believe it or not , I actually had fun in colour class the other day. Lilie Wang made us do art theraphy. She would give us a word and we'd be given 5 minutes to ourselves to paint freely while thinking of the word and we can paint anything. Anything at all. Okay lah 5 minutes so you cannot expect masterpeices right? But here are some of the results.

Love

Hate

Fear

Peace

Masculine

According to everyone ,my Love looks like peace and my peace looks like fear.

For my masculine .. *dies* I HAVE NO DAMN IDEA WHY I PAINTED THAT. I just think guys who are reckless very masculine. So i guess that explains the curls

the curls?

oh shit.

for those who dont get it. You dont have to.

2006-07-03T04:20:00.000-07:00

OKAAAAAAAAAAAAAY. I am so not cool when im sleeping. Apparently yesterday night liyana called me and needed to talk and I actually PICKED up the phone and talked to her. AND I DONT EVEN REMEMBER. In fact I clearly remember waking up at 2am and checking my phone and wondering why I didnt receive any sms or call.

And this morning when i opened my inbox there were two smses i received from yesterday which was already opened. So THAT MEANS i read them yesterday without even realising it.

THANK GOD it was liyana calling me. can you imagine if it was HIM. nanti aku membebel macam orang giler. "ahh. u call i buat aper? i ngah tido arr sayang.."

*facepalms*

Anyway youth day camp was awesome except for the fact that i was still seriously sick.Constantly blew my nose noisily during brienfing and activities.Yeap raudah the human trumpet. My cough got worse due to lack of sleep. And my swollen lip was more obvious than i thought it would be. When I first saw kak aishah she was like "EH what happened to your lips?" and then she told me the exact same thing that i said in the previous entry "You looked like you've been kissed very aggressively."

Ish how you know arr kak aishah?

heheh.

Oh lips please be normal by tommorow when I go to school.

2006-06-30T23:52:00.000-07:00

THAT would be the last time i ever drink that panadol for flu thing that supposedly tastes like "lemon". LEMON MY FINGERNAIL AHH , since when does lemon taste like puke. So yes , seeing that it taste so horrible i expected my flu to cure by today. But unfortunately , I drank puke for nothing. So I didnt go for floorball this morning even though I did wake up early for it. Because now , my upper lip is swollen. I look like i've just been kissing and angry man (random) . Its like red and everything. ECK! Oh and there's something wrong with my eyes as well. I dunno what ... but something. cause Benjamin asked me yesterday "What happened to your eyes?" . Well it does look like i havent been sleeping since Raffles was alive. I am soo going to get kicked out from floorball team. ALWAYS missing practices because of one reasons after another.

Photography classes had been okay. Although I did feel slightly apprehensive that I had to walk around orchard road snapping pictures of other people and stuffs. But I got used to everyone staring at me after a while. Snapping photos is one thing , developing them is another. If you havent know already I am a natural at being a clumsy idiot. I am the biggest butterfingers you can ever find in the whole of pasir ris. So imagine this. Now not only im using my hands , I have to do everything in the dark. Extreme and total darkness.

so damn bloody great.

This is all Khairudin's fault. Ever since he said "Raudah will always be raudah" I felt like a curse have been put upon me. I'll be a jinx forever.

Anyway I miss having Rowhani in my classes. That girl seriously cracks me up. Hahaha. Oh and if you want to know this girl , easy. Just go to Tampines Swimming Pool every wednesday night . There you'll see this huge group of makcik doing aerobics in the water accompanied by really really really loud music. And then amongst them you'll see one teenage girl and that girl is Rowhani. Her mum asked her to join and she did. I tell you , if my mum ever suggest such a thing I'd kill myself. HAHAHAHAH. But according to it really helps with the health.

So doing aerobics with a whole group of makciks in ninja turtle swimming suits with Don't Cha -Pussycat dolls (YEAP , im not even kidding u.they used this song!) as the background music doesnt bother her at all.

Like I said , she cracks me up and im starting to miss her eccentric-ness. haha.

Was tagged by Fatin.

Rules of the game: post 10 weird and random facts about yourself, then at the end list 5 people who are next in line to do this. Don't forget to leave a comment that says "you are tagged" in their blog and tell them to read yours."

1. I aspire to be a social worker.
2. I have a fear of dogs.
3. I just got 2 free movie tickets. WHOHOOOO
4. I always wear black. BLACK WHAT? heheh.
5. I was NOT forced to wear tudung thank you very much.
6. I berak a lot. haha. wtf
7. I dont think any guy can tolerate me. (Except for razali. haha)
8. I cant tolerate guys either
9. I joke
10. I hate people with no sense of humour

Terima kasih. bybye.

2006-06-25T22:12:00.000-07:00

I love it when nabil walks around with his pacifier and bantal busuk.So bloody irresistable. Today while he stood in front of the tv , I sneaked up to him , gave him a kiss then ran away. And he's like "eeeeeeeeiiiiiiiiii" . Ei , not eeeee.

Nabil is 2 years old by the way. Just in case you think i have a boyfriend who sucks a pacifier and walks around with his bantal busuk.

-_-

Anyway radioblogclub.com is corrupted. I keep getting pornographic pop-ups. SUCKS man , I need my music. Changed the music for this blog by the way. I'm currently addicted to Nickelback all over again.

Now.. Meet my favourite floorballers in the whole wide world.

Anyway , there is a pretty high chance I'll get cut from the floorball team. I can't come for practices because it clashes with my classes.

BLEAH.

::Nobody ever made me feel this way. I must stick with you::

2006-06-25T03:45:00.000-07:00

I never really felt the need to hate minahs until yesterday. I personally felt that if they wanna dress like freaking sluts or curse like the world owed them a living or shout to their parents in public like nobody's business or seeking fights because they thought it cool , it was their problem. Everyone's not perfect.

But I guess it didnt really bother me that much until yesterday during Fatayaats gathering. I am very much aware some girls out there are not fond of girls in tudung. I know this by reading blog entries and the enthuasistic agreement from the public. According to them , we stare at the way they dress and we apparently think highly of ourselves.

Oh well whatever makes you happy. But reality check , everyone looks at you when you stroll around with your chest stuffed with tissues and squeeze your leg full of babats in miniskirts. Everybody. I say this because I have friends who dont wear tudung. Of course not all minahs have tissue-fied boobs and legs with babats the size of england . I'm just saying this because there must be a reason why we stare at you.

Because minahs dont really interest me that much . I hardly think they're worth staring at. And about us thinking highly of ourselves.. Believe us , that opinion is mutual.

Im saying all this because yesterday two minahs were being extremely irritating on the bus. First of all , one of them stepped on Nadia's feet when she walked past us to get down from the bus . Instead of saying sorry , they laughed. Yeap people apparently this is the minahs sense of humour. Then one of them shouted "Ahhh padan muker , kasi pecah sekali!" so that the whole bus could hear. You think just cause you look like a hippotamus we scared is it?

A definition of a minah to me is someone who talks alot but have no brains. Yeap . A person who dresses sexily does not really mean that they are a minah. Some people are actually smart enough to distinguish between sexy and slutty. But minahs being stupid... DONT. A minah also hurl insults that dont make sense like "kasi pecah sekali" to a feet that has been stepped and also half their sentences are filled with vulgarities simply because they have no other words in their vocabulary. And etc other examples of their stupidity which im too lazy to mention.

For all those of you who feels the need to condemn whatever I said. Well is it my problem you think yourself as a minah?

anyway fatayaats gathering was whooping great! shall update with pictures later.

2006-06-23T05:31:00.000-07:00

Today it rained so heavily that i couldn't leave home without an umbrella. I hate carrying umbrella so usually i'd rather let myself get wet in the rain. But today I seriously had no choice.

So yeah i had to bring this really huge umbrella to school.So bloody unglam

BUT.

Its okay. I felt a connection to all the cute boys that brought an umbrella. Hoho. I find it so macho that they carried an umbrella. Like they dont care what people think of them. Yeap , thats hot.I know it sounds ridiculous .Of course it does.

What do you think i am, normal?

2006-06-20T19:05:00.000-07:00

Went "studying" with Fatin, Qazim , Wani and Hidayah on Monday. I miss the conversations i can have with them and their extreme"Witty-ness" and bitchiness.Especially Hidayah.

SHAIRAH , you wanna know what hidayah did this time?!?! I swear if you were there you'd be like "HIDAYAH!! I can't believe you said that". haha.

We were having this conversation about the importance of looks for the guys you like.

Me: Hidayah , looks isnt everything
Hidayah:Yarrrr... You should know.

HAHAHAHAHA.I DONT BELIEVE HER. seriously. Ouch man

Oh and then there's this other time she and fatin were telling me something that happened in mj to the both of them.

Hidayah: .... And HALF the school turned to look at us
Fatin: Hidayah.. It was only Shairah.

Hidayah: Our school dont have toilets for the handicaps sey
Fatin: huh? There's one in every toilet Hidayah!
Hidayah: *thinks*. OH ! so that's what the big cubicles in toilets are for!!
Me: -_- who did you think it was for? Orphans?

In conclusiong today me, fatin , qazim and wani had loads of fun laughing at hidayah.

::I was so young you should have known better than to lean on me::

2006-06-17T04:58:00.000-07:00

Father's day has always been a big nothing for me.This year is no different.Now , someone please give me a hug.

I was in the mood for hindustan movies today. heheh. So I decided to watch Chalte Chalte alone. Its weird how different I am when i watch a love story alone and when I watch movies with my friends.

Anyway , there were a lot of lessons learnt from the movie. YESH YESH , raudah takes love lessons from hindi movies.

And Rani Mur-apertah-jiji reminds me of my mother. BLEAH. No not in terms of looks , mind you. Though they're both short and vuluptious.And they have the same way of flicking their hair. But yeah , the similiarity stops there.

Anyway , I'm just saying the character in the movie reminds me of my mum. For those who knows me well enough should know. Actually I dont think anybody knows.

Ahhh nvm. Let me be emo by myself.

:::i like you ,would you be my father-figure?:::

2006-06-16T00:36:00.000-07:00

was tagged by liyana and atiqah

7 RANDOM FACTS ABOUT ME
- I tend to fall for guys with curly hair.Even though I dont find curly hair attractive.
- I laugh really loudly at dirty jokes.
- My close friends think im a prude.
- Im a frequent visitor at youtube.com
- I make an impossible girlfriend. (which is why im single)
- I have a habit of singing in the toilet. Which is quite embarassing because sometimes in school .. I forget that im not alone.
- I eat a LOT.

7 THINGS THAT SCARE ME
- MOMOK!
- snakes and dogs
- When a guy gets too close.yeap ,this is why my friends think im a prude. among other reasons
- When my secret diaries are discovered
- My jokes not being laughed at
- LONG EYE CONTACT!!
- No tags on my board. NOOOOOOOOOOOOO

7 RANDOM MUSIC AT THE MOMENT
- this is boring to fill up and even more boring to read.sooo... NEXT!

7 THINGS I LIKE THE MOST
- polka dots
- Moshies (Shaifulfarhanshidawani etc..)
- Tembamtots (liyananabilah)
- Nameless Clique (FatinHidayahShairahAliaQazim etc...)
- FLOORBALL
- Romance Novels
- Photoshop of course

7 THINGS I SAY THE MOST

- I dunno
- Kepala otak kau
- I'm emo
- Yes , you may kiss the ground I walk on
- i'm not interested (in relationships)
- PAUL TWOHILL IS SEXY
- RAUDAH IS SEXY

7 PEOPLE TO DO THIS
- Fatin
- Shida
- Qazim
- Wani
- Aimran
- Salihah
- Raihanah

2006-06-13T01:37:00.000-07:00

The world is full of weirdos and samdols.

Just today i learned from liyana that a guy i know spotted me at afghanistan yesterday. And apparently I waved at him. So i smsed him that "No i didnt wave at you yesterday. I wasnt even at afghanistan..."

But does he accept my clarification. NO WAYYYYYY. no according to him , "kau jangan nak extra2 , aku berbual ngan liyana"

So people its perfectly normal for you to have a twin sister that you do not know off running around afghanistan. YEAP. You should act all right about it. Afterall it might only just be your father's secret love child.

Where is the justice.

Oh and yeah , he ended the whole conversation by smsing me "BLOODY FEMINIST!! FEMINIST FEMINIST!!"

Yes people , its alright to be irrelevant and stupid too. Like , in a middle of a conversation about your parents , you are allowed to shout "SEX BOMB! SEX BOMB!"

because its cool.

Anyway , I think Fityan Guys are the only ones with this big problem about feminists. I WAS SOO CONVINCED THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD HATE FEMINISTS. And suddenly I realised THE WHOLE WORLD DOESNT CARE!!

bloody hell.

Its not like I go around murdering off guys or tell everyone that all males are pigs.

AM I EVEN A FEMINIST IN THE FIRST PLACE.
Oh yes , and also I think only fityan guys (and maybe the girls) think im a feminist.

-_-

You guys should meet shairah and hidayah.

I think fityan guys are too sensitive and have no sense of humour. I know its a controvesial statement to put in my blog. BUT.. its true. Like there was this one time my msn nick was something about women , and this fityan guy actually pmed me "FEMINIST!!!" and blocked me while all the other guys I chatted with was like "cool nick."

i mean , IT IS EVIDENT. you guys may not admit it , but it's true.

HAHA. I am so gonna die for posting this. But it was fun blogging about it. so whatteheck.

Anyway yesterday , while my father's secret lovechild aka the girl that my friend claimed was me was at afghanistan. I was teaching tuition in pasir ris to my pr2 student. and I think I finally realised the TRUE her.

She's so cheeky nak mampos. Yesterday I taught her this whole list of words to describe feelings. And we both acted out the words so she can remember it better. She did the word "confident" so well. She catwalked across the room and said "I am beautiful.. Everyone loves me .. I have a lot of boyfriends" with this so menyampah accent. CRACKED ME UP MAN.

And I was teaching her about the word lovestruck and she's like. "Teacher.. Tell me about love..."

Primary two dah gatal learn pasal love. HAHAHA

2006-06-11T07:46:00.000-07:00

I am embarassingly poor at the moment. My bank account has $3.61 left. YES , amazing aint it? And with this $3.61 i entered a PRADA outlet with shame today. Me , Nabilah and Liyana in a posh shop where everything is above 100 bucks! nope , we didnt belong.

Me: Mak all these dresses , kalau aku beli tak berani sey nak kentut.
*All laughs*
Nabilah: Orang kaya mana kentut.

HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA

Anyway , do you guys ever wonder why women are usually more excited about hari raya than guys? I think I know why. Because this is like the only time we can be in control people.

My future husband will so suffer under my hands.Imagine eh during spring cleaning.

"Try putting the sofa over there.... Now its nicer... No actually I don't like it that much. Try over there instead. HMMMMM.. No not nice , try putting it here. Okay now.. For that huge dining table in the kitchen........"

over and over again until he leaves me for another woman.

I was talking about hari raya with razali the other day. And he says that he hates wearing baju kurung during raya. EVEN ON THE FIRST DAY. that is seriously , a crime. Now we know ,I and him CANNOT marry. Haha. I'll be like

"APER? U nak pakai jeans for first day of raya. I NAK MINTAK CERAI SEKARANG JUGAK!!!"

I am going to make my future husband wear whatever I ask him to wear. If I want us to wear pink , we WILL wear pink baju kurung for that year. And if I want him to wear songkok with polka dots on it , he WILL wear songkok with polka dots. I DONT CARE.

And I'm going to spend his cash like nobody's business.

Sayanggg , bunga tu lawa eh kalau taruk pat rumah kiter....

Alahhh ayang... Kasut tu tak mahal.. Setakat 300 ratus dolar 5 sen jerr..

and he'll be like "EWAHH , you ingat I cap duit ker?"

You tak sayang I lagi ker??

HAHAH! i'll drive him freaking nuts.

2006-06-07T08:56:00.000-07:00

When you're not sure if the person you love, loves you anymore

and a new person comes along

do you continue waiting or do you move on?

or do you run away.

2006-06-03T22:41:00.000-07:00

I think my dad is convinced that my brother and I are members of a satanic cult. Seriously. Like , today I asked him where the iron was , and he's like "Aper nak jadi ngan korang dua ni ah?"

Gee , dad i don't know. I really was planning to destroy the world with the iron. But now that you found out my secret....

-_-

According to Razali , yesterday was Raudah-day! It sounds quite weird if you pronounce it. raudadeh . Hoho. So yes , it really was raudadeh. Got to eat about 6 drumlets and super supreme pizza and chocolate symphony ice cream for my long awaited pizza hut treat. yum yum. And Razali bought me this really damn nice top which i shall wear as soon as I can.

THANKYOUthankyouTHANKYOUthankyouTHANKYOUthankyouTHANKYOU.

Oh and I bumped into Haza and Mirah at tamp.
Mirah: Saper tu?
Me: My friend
Haza: Maner? Oh tu. Wah... Macho.

Razali is going to kill me for posting this sey.Sorry eh , couldnt resist posting that. You wont kill me anyway , you're too nice. =D

2006-05-25T11:23:00.000-07:00

Dear Raudah,

You have a nice______. You make me _______. You should _______. Someday I will ______. You and me =________. If I saw you now I'd __________. I would build a _______ just for you. If I could sing you any song it would be _________.Love,_______________(P.S. ______________.)

I will love whoever who fill this for me. HEHEH.can send as friendster testimonial or put in your blog or send me letter or.. whatever.

Now i shall do for the last 4 people i talked to. these people must do for me kay. If not....

for the rest of the world , you do for me , i'll do for you.

Dear Fatin,

You have a nice [eye/eyes] . You make me [ashamed of my sepet eyes]. You should [not forget me]. Someday I will [give you your birthday present. HAHA] You + me = [loud noise] If I saw you now I'd [talk non-stop]. I would build a [tree] just for you. If I could sing you any song it would be [that's what friends are for].
Love,[raudah]
PS: [your present is seriously on its way.]

Dear Shida,
You have a nice [sexy head!!!]. You make me [horny]. You should [marry fahmy].Someday I will [cook for you]. You + me = [lots of dirty jokes]. If I saw you now [I'd squeeze your babats].I would build a[penguin robot just for you].If I could sing you any song it would be [a duet with you]
Love,Raudah
PS: [I miss your sexy head and babats!]

Dear Liyana,
You have a nice [fingernail?]. You make me [grateful to have a friend like you].You should [love me always]. Someday I will [get married to syed azmir].You + me = [blopundi].If I saw you now I'd [ask you to go to sleep].I would build a [fish pond] just for you. If I could sing you any song it would be [terrible]
Love,
Raudah
PS: [tembamanish! tembamanish!]

Dear Razali,
You have a nice [friend named raudah].
You make me [laugh all the time]. You should [buy me flowers always].Someday I will [get that 100 points and get my pizza hut treat]. You + me = [random]. If I saw you now I'd [ask you what you are doing in my room at 3am in the morning].I would build a [treehouse] just for you. If I could sing you any song it would be [razali DEAR. HAHAHA *inside joke*]
Love,
Raudah
PS: [DAGING!!]

as you can see. i was bored.

2006-05-24T10:14:00.000-07:00

Don't you just hate guys who says they like or are attracted to you. And when you dont give any reaction , they go ,

"I was just joking.." or "I wasn't thinking when I said that."

Dude , whatever.

2006-05-17T07:19:00.000-07:00

Design is lurve (im not in the pictures , btw)

I just started teaching tuition to this pr2 kid. I am seriously the worst tuition teacher in the whole world. On our first lesson (last tuesday) i accidentally brought home the kid's ruler. Can you imagine? The next day when i found it in my pencil box i was like "OMG! I STOLE MY STUDENT'S RULER" .

Today , I accidentally told her that keju was "butter" . KEJU IS CHEESE LAH RAUDAH , YOU GUNDU. haha. And i almost brought home her pencil.

Soon enough i'll accidentally bring home her TV.

My form of transportation to work (work sey) , is .. not helicopter , not rocket , not aeroplane , not bas.. but jeng jeng jeng..

a bicycle!!!

The bicycle is like damn bloody huge. I wonder how long they take to build it sey. Its heavy like hell. dahlah aku ni sekeping jer.. Anyway i love cycling the thing cause it moves fast. I'm either stupid or brave arr , but i decided to turn here turn there , just to see if i will fall.

yes , Raudah the daredevil.

Today i wore baju kurung to school. WHOA WHOA. There's this girl who commented i looked nice. Wah , made my day sey. Anyway my aunt almost died of shock when she saw me. I decided that today will be the day i will finally act like a true blue "anak dara", all proper and ladylike. Until of course i had to run for the frigging bus. UNGLAM SIA!!

Tommorow Floorball at 9 till 11. And then 12.30 till dunno what , got Malay Arts Group orientation which im not sure i want to go.

2006-05-17T02:11:00.000-07:00

I am residing in the school library with 15 mins to spare on the computer.

im not sure what i want to blog about but here goes.

Today in marketing class , bimbojimbo's (name has been censored) underwear had been the cause for 10 minutes of extreme laughter. Marc took picture with bimbojimbo's underwear without bimbojimbo knowing. Bimbojimbo of course wasnt aware that his underwear is the cause for 10 minutres of extreme laughter. WE ARE EVIL TO BIMBOJIMBO.

Only yesterday did i realise that not everyone in the world is flat-footed. Marc kindly told everyone about my stupiditiy. And now everyone calls me flat-foot. BLEAH.

Yesterday , Marc fell off the chair . Eh wait, correction. he fell with the chair and landed under the computer table.

HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA padan muker. =P Laugh at me some more.

Today , i found out what neneh means. At least that's how i think its spelt.

NENEH IS BOOBS

i am enlightened now.

2006-05-12T00:06:00.000-07:00

I CANNOT WATCH SAD MOVIES.

with that said , i'd just finish watching "hingga akhir nyawa" .

there was nobody at home , thank god! I'm a what you might call , an "interactive audience" . Like the part where nura (played by erra fazira's character) shooed her parents away. I threw pillows to the tv screen saying "YOU STUPID BITCH. YOU STUPID BLOODY BITCH!" and at random frustrating moments i will just go "ARRRRRRGHHHHHHHHHH!!!" and hug my pillows. The part where the mother was dying and she tadah her hands to doa. I lifted my hands as well , i was like "turn her to stone! turn her to stone" , getting myself ready to say "amin~" . Until she said , "God , please forgive my daughter's sins." i swear to you i actually shouted,

"KEPALA OTAK KAU !!!"

I was so frustrated.

The part where yusry shooed nura away from home was like the most satisfying moment ever. "Aku tak nak tengok muka kau selagi kau tak mintak ampun ngan mak bapak kau!!" Yusry is my hero. After that scene i switched off the tv. That's the ending of the movie for me. In my mind , after nura got chased away , she got herself killed by lori taik. And now she's in hell.

So yes , i dont care what really happens in the movie after this scene. No one should tell me. She is dead. Lori taik hit her.

I watched "Airmata ibu" today as well. Suria is out to kill me today. Anyway i watched the movie halfway only. Chickened out at the part the house got burnt and the two kids were crying. If i didnt turn off the tv i'd join them crying as well. So ...

two posts in a day. This is rare.

2006-05-11T21:19:00.000-07:00

My lecturer told me I had a strong understanding of marketing.

uhhhh .. what?

Anyway , yesterday floorball was great. The coach asked what my number was . Not my phone number idiot. I mean , my serial number. So that either means im uberly bad or uberly good. I pray to god , its not because im uberly bad. But Syimir told me i played well yesterday. So yes , I am hopeful.

Me , Siti(Rai) , Saleha , Su and Fasha went to eat KFC after floorball training. Su is super kecoh . I like~ . Su is actually short form for Su Fong by the way. She was the only chinese in our team , so we called her Su to give her a malay-ish vibe.HAHA. The girl is super fun to hang around with.

And i really hope , me , rai no 1 , rai no 2 , su , fasha , saleha get to join floorball together.Because , i luff them all. And afiqah.. where were you yesterday ahh?

Shairah , Hidayah , Fatin came to visit temasek poly yesterday. Shairah was like "wow , raudah you have an unlimited supply of guys here." haha. And when we stepped into the school , hidayah actually said "Wah , this is like , a whole new world!"

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

I miss them. Suddenly remembered the days , they'd come to my house and we'd dance in my room like crazy. HAHA. home-clubbing. Well , since i cant and wont(insyallah) go clubbing , might as well make-do with anything right?!And i miss shida and wani coming to my house and we'll cook together in the kitchen. KECOHRABLES.

Eh has anyone watch the music video for temperature- sean paul. the part where sean paul is in the rain with the girl , holding the bright yellow umbrella. Am i the only one who finds it sexy? I think its the bright yellow umbrella.

its so wrong that its right.

Edit : Eh SP got floorball camp? So fun......... TP have or not?

2006-05-06T23:45:00.000-07:00

Escape Theme Park on Labour Day. You might notice , that im not in most of the pictures.I was the one taking them ,you idiots.

Only pasir ris have this kind of bus stops. Because we're cool.

Fishball theory proven.

Yes , ive grown now

This is Haikal's trademark pose. He does this whenever he's thinking or nervous. So during all the scary rides , everyone is like "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA" he just sits there , biting his thumb.

haikal caught red-handed.

This is his 2nd trademark pose. He does this when he needs the toilet.

OMIGOODNESS check out that babe!
psst. that's hanisah's sister by the way. Both of them are so bloody alike , its scary.

SMILE AT THE PHOTOGRAPHER(me)!

Finally , a group picture.

Will update all the photos on my fotopage account.... later.

I have nickname in poly now. They call me "heart". Because of my bright red heart-shaped brooch. Yes , i do wear it everyday. So random people come up to me just to press the brooch. I dont really know how i should feel about this.

haha .

But you know , its kind of a cool nickname. People might think i'm called "heart" because im a holy person or something.

2006-05-03T07:58:00.000-07:00

I almost did not go for floorball trials.

I have been so clumsy for the past week that i had managed to obtain quite an alarming number of injuries. First of all , two of my toes had blisters . And my skin at the back of my feet was red raw. I somehow injured my knuckles when i played pool with Shairah and Fatin. And I cut my finger.

Not to mention , I seemed to be bumping into everything and everyone .And spilling drinks and food all over my clothes.

As if thats not enough the day of the trials , i fell down the stairs at the temasek poly bridge. STAIRSSSSSSSSS. get this , stairsss. No , i didnt roll all the way down. I actually landed on my butt , in a sitting position. Acting , like it was the most normal thing in the world i decided to just sit there until everyone stopped staring at me.

Dont even dare ask me how long i sat there.

Seriously.

Anyway i decided , i'd just give the floorball thing a try and attended the trials. I wore the wrong trousers and the wrong shoes , and i couldnt help but feel slightly insecure that i was the only girl in tudung there. But whatever , i got 1st for the long-distance thingy!

GO ME!!

2006-04-28T07:43:00.000-07:00

I fell in love with the temasek poly library.

So if anyone out there has a secret obsession with me. You now have access to secret information on stalking me. Cause i'll be in the library every day.

Today , the debate club spoke about a very interesting topic. "Are women more annoying than men?" Natural instincts would of course ,make me say that men are more annoying. Its called "defending your species". But honestly speaking , i get more annoyed at women than men.

In fact i find all females (except for myself) annoying . And im pretty sure this applies to everyone out there. You know , like when i see a group of girls shamelessly flirting with the guy i have been eyeing , i get annoyed. i find minahs much much much more annoying than matreps .Most importantly i find pretty girls MUCH MUCH more annoying than handsome boys.

i find , giggling ,whining and crying girls very annoying.Even Though i am very much aware know i have done all these things.

Why? You ask me.

Well for the guys out there (some of you), ever wondered why you hate taufik batisah so much and have no clue why we girls ,go goo-goo-ga-ga over him.

The same principles are applied.

I have yet to find a "kaki" in poly. Everyone i meet seems to be the kind who goes home straight. WHY? WHY? WHY? its such a waste of transportation money to come to school only for a few hours then go back home. No life issit.

haha .this , coming from a girl who spends her free time residing in the library . ALONE

OMG ,i am a loser.

2006-04-26T22:00:00.000-07:00

Today nabil and iman thought it was their duty to wake me up. And they decide the only way to do that was to pour powder all over me while i sleep.

-_-

But whatever , i woke up smelling all nice.

I have yet to list down the many ways both of them had used to wake me up. Let's see , there's the traditional "pouring water in my face" . Or screaming at the top of their lungs in my ears. Last time my maid would put nabil on top of me. And he'll scratch my face till i wake up.

My sympathy goes out to their future wives.

Anyway , my habit for sleeping for ungodly long hours , in legendary. So much so , i have earned myself the nickname "Sleeping beauty" in my house. Not that im complaining of course.

Next tuesday is floorball trials , which i really really want to go. But im not sure i've got the guts to go there alone. I've tried asking people who might be interested to try out with me. But so far, nobody wants to!! Somebody has to , i can't go there alone...

I'm an insecure person.

Haikal is soo not helping. He says that im too short for the cca. EXCUSE ME!!! i am sooooooooooo not short. i'm taller than like... a whole bunch of people. I've never been so insulted. Seriously.

Well at least i can spell "squash" court properly. Unlike someee people.

Haikal: Have you seen the rock-climbing gym?
Me: No..
Haikal: The one beside the squesh court.
Me: Squesh?
Me: HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA
Haikal: Oi ,aper lah.
Me: its squash lah bodo.
Haikal: Oh.

Whoever thinks the "squesh" when pronounced is seriously damn funny please raise both hands.

*raises both hands*

Small things like this amuse me to no end.

On to another subject , as you guys have noticed , i have a new layout.I hadnt done any work for a long time in photoshop. So on a rainy bored day , i decided to that i should do a new layout. Took me quite a while to put everything together. Especially the words.

For all those people who hates pink. This wasnt a personal attack

-_-

2006-04-23T09:09:00.000-07:00

For the 3rd consecutive time , i write my entry in a tired state. Im supposed to be sleeping right now and rest my aching body. But im too hyped up. Just returned from a whole day at sentosa. I went there thinking it was a SPYDRA outing but it was actually an outing for the whole FOC empires.So yesh , we dominated the beach.

Unsurprisingly i was the only girl in tudung there. This does not in any way bother me. What bothers me is the constant questioning about whether i was feeling hot or not.

No idiots , i was born with an aircon sticking out of my butt.

OF COURSE HOT LAH.

But i do understand why people ask me that. Its the same like when you cut your hair and the whole day you go to school everyone goes up to you and ask "you cut your hair issit?"

In life , even the obvious needs clarification.

ANYWAYYYY.. i had tons and tons and tons of fun. Not so much in the afternoon because it was hot and i hate volleyball. But i got to play soccer a while. And i got some comments that im really good at it. But i think what they mean is that im really good.. for a girl player. OWELLLS.

I think im seriously thick skin. I got khairudin to buy me slurpee and used 2 dollars of farhan's money. After that i ate khairudin's fries and drank his drink. I bet they're like "wah this girl so tak tahu malu" . Anyway i refuse to call khairudin , din even though everyone calls him that. I dont know why i have something against nicknames. It just bugs me. Like dont ever call me "Rau". IT IS NOT COOL OKAY. "RAUDAH" has a very nice meaning thank you very much. it means , "heaven" .

"Rau" on the other hand has no meaning. It is seriously a big whatthefook. So yeah , call me raudah.

Everyone was having much more fun than me at the beach. Because they went to bathe in the sea and played loads of games. And the girls were all in bikinis. shorts , t-shirts, whatever. I on the other hand was busy trying to apparate to Antratica. SERIOUSLY , it was that hot.

After a friggin long day at the beach , we all headed to outside plaza singapura to eat together. ALL OF US. which was about a hundred , or probably more. Public nuisance moments. haha. And we would constantly say that we're from Republic Poly out loud. You know ... so tp's name would still be clear.

We're so smart.

2006-04-21T20:14:00.000-07:00

I have been surrounded by never-ending awesomeness for the past 4 days. By this i mean , TEMASEK DESIGN SCHOOL is the best best best place to be in. I have never seen a more creative , exciting and a more united bunch of people. Everywhere i turn to i get to know a dynamic personality. Crazy fashion sense , loud voices , amusing antics , we have it all.

I had fun going along with the cheers of disturbing all the other schools in temasek poly. Our goal was to annoy the pants off them. Hopefully ..

we succeded.

DESIGN OIEEEEEEEE!!

We ended our design orientation camp yesterday with a mass shower , which is an annual tradition of temasek design school. Basically the freshies are cramped in one area and the seniors all throw pails and buckets of water at us. Our school director had cheated our feelings by saying that he decided to discontinue the tradition because he didnt want us to feel victimised. But at the end of the speech he said something like "We dont want you to feel victimised but the seniors have decided we should continue the tradition"

And before we knew it , all of us was drenched from head to toe .
DAMN SHIOK and

a bloody waste of water.

The designers also danced two nights in a row. One was the last night of design camp , during our own school's jam and hop and the second one , the next night with the rest of the school.

So that's 3 Jam & Hop i missed. THREEEE... i prolly wont dance for the rest of my life either. But i guess it would be worth it. I very much dislike all those people who tell me , other people in tudung also go jam&hop to dance.

I am not one of those tudung people. I have my own principles. Doesnt mean a lot of them do it , i am consented to do it.

so let me be.

Anyway , i am beginning to think i will enjoy school very much. First of all , i only have to go to school 4 times a week. Design freshies have Mondays off. WHOOOTS. 2ND of all , design is thy place to be.

all im worried about is the no exams system. Im so used to the secondary school system im not sure i can cope with only relying on projects. And everyone around me are so talented , i am seriously no match to them.

but i will try my very best to not only be a match but be the best among them.

I can be so competitve sometimes. But this is serious. I want dont want to stop at getting a diploma. I want to go all the way to university.I chose poly instead of jc by promising to myself that i will give my all to reach my goal of holding a degree.

YAY FOR EXTREMELY AMBITIOUS DREAMS.

I still have one more week to rot at home cause school start , earliest 2nd of May. BLEAH . I want school to start now.

EDIT: i was browsing through blogs and found this

i'm back from tat suxy camp by my tp design seniors...torture is wad they noe...they keep torturing us wif water n i hate water...it stinks n it's cold veri de cold...

WHATTEFOOK.

All this while , you bathe in sand issit?

insufferable spoilt brats with water heaters at home and who can't spell .SHEESH

2006-04-16T23:42:00.000-07:00

Fatigue is taking over me , i will not be able to update properly.

I am exhausted to the point of insanity. 4 days of extreme sweating and lack of sleep. 3 days of TP orientation camp and one whole day of captain's ball tournament consecutively.

Today i finally have a peaceful day at home. And the next four days starting tommorow will be of design school orientation . and then 2 days rest before school starts , that is , i have no plans for the weekends which is rare.

Not funny.

However i cant deny that i am enjoying myself. So , i shall stop whining

Now lets talk about the tp camp. I think the GLs are cool people. I'm considering joining them. We'll see. I think my group's GL is the best . Im not only saying this just to say this (??) but because i seriously think so. the're so passionate and dedicated and soooo nice to us.They are also the hottest compared to the other groups. HOHO. i am serious. So many eyecandies.And they GL think of the horniest cheers. .

DUN U WISH UR DING DING
WAS BIG LIKE MINE???
DUN U WISH UR BLONG BLONG WAS LONG LIKE MINE???
NOW ITS TIME TO FIGHT....PENETRATE

A cup B cup go away
C cup D cup come my way
E cup F cup
girls : WALAU EH
boys : SOUP BOWLLLLLLLL!!

and yes we did this with hand actions.There was this one particular horny cheer our gls thought of about all the other empires and commitee, Antor , Mantis , Centis , Beenox and our empire , Spydra. The cheer too long , i can't remember. It was damn hilarious , too bad we didnt use it.

Although there was only few malays and i was the only girl in tudung in Spydra, i didnt feel like they discriminate me or anything. Everyone was seriously super nice to me.Although , the girls really concerned about me suffering underneath all that clothes. What not , i was covered from head to toe for like 3 friggin days.

Manhunt was quite a traumatising experience. I was convinced it was just a typical manhunt competition so each of the empire just send a random guy on stage.until sahfahri said something like "there is no such thing as a non-pervertic game in temasek poly" . So yeah ,each guy representitive from each group had to stripped from their shirts. The game was judged by only one criteria which was, which guy had the longest and bushiest armpit hair. The rule was the , the contestant weren't supposed to know. The rule was only revealed at the end of the game.

Supposedly , this year's standard has dropped. Thank god. ARMPIT HAIR IS NOT MACHO OKAY.

All the other games were more horny than this . Oh yes they were.

I only danced for a while for jam&hop. I didnt think it felt right because i was wearing tudung and was like sort of clubbing.The lights were off and there was those laser lights and smoke. I very much wanted to dance rigth there and then. But alas , i restrained myself. Which was damn hard seeing that the music was hip hop and the bass was awesome.

I really miss dance.

Anyhows , like i said i only danced for a while . I decided to get out of the crowd. Me and Reza joined the malay GLs sitting outside to enjoy the fresh air.Thank god , if not i would have to sit at the side like a loser. I guess this was better cause now i know a few seniors.

The last night was quite emotional. A lot of tears . I didnt cry , but yes i was really sad that it was ending. I was getting really attached to everyone.

ANYWAY TP MASS DANCE ROCKS.

liyana says blop blop blop , raudah says pundi
blopblopblop + pundi = blopundi

2006-04-12T01:21:00.000-07:00

My mum thinks im going to a school called tampines polytechnic

-_-

2006-04-08T11:09:00.000-07:00

"Aper tu yang bau hangus.... ?" has become a common phrase in my household.For the benefit of non-malay speaking people it actually means , "What is that burning smell ?" . The reason being , I , Siti Raudah Bte Fawzi Laza , have decided to start cooking my own food. Unfortunately for me , no one is being supportive of my intentions.So what if my fried prata , nuggets , chicken are mostly black , it is not hangus , it is just overly garing.

I am going to continue cooking my own stuff. Deal with it.

Anyway i can't wait to start schooling. Having no school for so many months has made me a whiny person. I whine about my problems , i whine about my life.. I think the reason for that is the fact that i have nothing to distract me. When i go to school and surround myself with friends , its easy for me to not think about the bad stuffs.

However , there are some moments where all i wanna do is think about the bad stuff. Even if my friends tell me , well at least you have this , at least you have that. I refuse to think about all the positive things in my life. I just want to wallow myself up in self-pity. Lose my guard and literally have a crying fest. Because im sick of always thinking about the positive stuffs in life. What? just because there's something positive in my life , i dont deserve the right to cry? Well if that's the case then all of you out there wont get to cry either. Because we all have something to be happy about in our life , whether it is a family , a friend , a brother , beauty , brains etc etc.

Don't get me wrong , I want to be a strong person but sometimes , and only sometimes , just please let me be weak.

Okay everyone im sure this is just a phase im going through. All the emo stuffs. I'll get over it soon. ANYWAYYYYYYYYYYYYYY.. i was bored so i decided to take a quiz.

You Are The Girlfriend From Hell!

You're hell on wheels, which is sometimes a good thing.
But it's often a bad thing, as you usually leave your guy's head spinning.
Slow down, or else your relationship will end in a loud crash.
Or you'll end up with a guy so wild - even you can't tame him.

What Kind of Girlfriend Are You?

Oh wells . it was expected.

2006-04-07T08:44:00.000-07:00

LOBAK is my favourite word at the moment. Because i think it sounds super cool. Anyway i've been tagged by liyana to do this thingy. If not dont think i'd wanna do it. First of all the whole thing iS tYpeD LiKe ThiS. So i had to type the questions out on my own. Or ThE wHOlE EnTrY WOuLd IrRItATE thE HaIr Out yOUr HEad.

THE FINAL FIVE:Remove the blog in the top spot form the following list and bump everyone up in one place. THen add your blog at the bottom spot.

1.TooLate
2.the_materialistic_world
3.da LIl GeRl In Me - PriNcEsZ ZOhrA BLog!!!
4.memores dat last forever_liyana
5. LOBAK ME ________raudah.

THen You SeLEcT 5PEoPLE to SprEAd thE lOvE
1.Fatin
2.Shida
3.Fahmy
4.Wani
5. Syed Azmir

What were you doing 5 years ago?
Watching WWF and strategising the many ways to assasinate kurt angle . I used to think he was the spawn of satan.

5 snacks you enjoy
1. Nano nano
2. Potato chips hot an spicy
3. G.V popcorn sweet
4. Sweet and spicy drumlets
5. famous amos

5 songs which you know all the lyrics off your head now..
1. the Hi-5 songs.I have been forced to watch the damn show every afternoon that i can sing the theme song backwards now
2.Rasa sayang eh!! rasa sayang sayang eh!!
3.Rossa- Pudar
4. Majulah singapura
5. We care - temasek school song!!!!

5 things you would do if you were a millionare
1. Build a school. LOBAK PRIMARY SCHOOL.
2.Buy myself a laptop
3.Build a hospital LOBAK GENERAL HOSPITAL
4.Go for facial treatments
5.Buy a new house for Jup-Jup so he would stop stealing all katheleen's stuff. Im talking about Hi-5 by the way.

5 things you like to do
1.Pinch Nabil's cheeks
2.Shopping like im paris hilton.
3. calling people selenger
4. hugging
5. Signing autographs =)

5 fav toys
TOYS ARE FOR KIDS ,SELENGER

-------------------------------------

Gila-gila pengantin popular cracked me up. Especially the last part. "Taip pengantin undi.. ataupun... Pundi"

HAHAHAHHAHAHAHA PUNDI. pundi sounds sooo vulgar.

PUNDI!!!!!

I wanna be with you
If only for a night
To be the one who's in your arms
to hold you tight

besok main netball! yay!

2006-04-04T00:26:00.000-07:00

GLOOMY DAY.

this only happens once in a while. But yeah i think it has something to do with waking up so late. I've been having trouble sleeping nowadays. Like , on Saturday i went to bed at about 12++ but i only slept at like ..6 am. I hate this so much. I DUNNO WHY ITS SO DIFFICULT TO SLEEP.

Yesterday i slept at 6 am. But that was because i was conferencing on the phone with Abdillah and Haza.its been a while since i talked to them.

Anyway ive just been cheated 18 dollars of my money. On a facial foam. 18 dollars so expensive!! The saleswoman lah. I was contented with buying the 6 dollars one. But she made me buy the 18 dollars one. Told me my face got loads of whiteheads and blackheads. OUCHHHHHHH. then after buying it ,she informed me that i will experience a break-out. Cause it will remove all the dirt inside first ... Then after a while it'll be okay. But dont worry .. after that your face will be okay.

Thanks for telling but gee i would appreciate it if you tell me before i paid the 18 dollars!!!

This is sooo not what i need. My temasek poly orientation camp is in 1 week! I do not want a break-out on my orientation camp , thank you very much. Orientation is like the beginning of my whole social life in poly.Not to mention the day after orientation camp is over i've got that captain's ball tournament at masjid Darusallam. and he'll be there.

ARGH ARGH.

I told my mum of how i was physcologically robbed by this freaking saleswoman. to get her sympathy.

Me: Adah dipaksa beli facial foam $18!!
Her: Saper plak yang paksa ?
Me: The saleswoman. Dia kutuk muka adah sampai adah beli facial foam tu.
Her: lahh...
Me: Sekarang duit adah dah habis
Her: Nanti mama kasi lagi...

YESSSSSS..

I have come to the decision im going to wear selendang for the orientation camp.Dilemma of the century. Because i do not want to wear selendang for camp because its leceh. You know like if i wake up in the morning everyone just change into their shorts and t-shirts and i'll have to wear my long pants , long-sleeve t-shirt , skop , then my tudung , the pins on my tudung .... blah blah blah.

But on the other hand ive got to take this tudung business very seriously. I can't just one day wear , one day dont wear. What sort of message would i convey to people. That i can just wear it as and when i like. That if it put me at a disadvantage in any way , i'll just not wear it. No , i have to make it a commitment now.

This is determined raudah speaking okay.

Only 1 more week to poly life. I'm feeling the pressure already. However one of the pressures have been solved. I dont need to worry about clothes anymore because my makcik just practically gave me half he wadrobe. Her reason being , she feels so guilty buying clothes and not wearing them because she has sooo many. So now i have like 31283913812931390 new blouses and skirts and kurtas in my wadrobe. They are mostly quite oversized but that can be arranged cause my other makcik is a genius with the sewing machine.

Also i do not have to worry about bags anymore. As I have two new ones , courtesy of my makcik also. And guess what one of it is Prada. PRADA !!! omg now i have a PRADA bag to wear to school. can you imagine? I bet Shairah is jealous already. haha. Okay , now you know the extend of my aunt's genorisity. And how many things she has! So many many things that she can give away a good-conditioned PRADA bag.

Reza says i should not hide the PRADA bag underneath my tudung. I'm like , no wayyyyyyyyyyy.. I'm going to shove it under everyone's noses. Seriously. I should wear the bag above my tudung and not underneath it. Then everyone will think i am very very rich. I'll be like , the next paris hilton! THE MUSLIM VERSION. whoots whoots.

Eh i've got this feeling something is going to go wrong somehow. I mean ,the whole enrolment thing.I'm worried i skipped a step of . But i think i've done and sent everything. Except apply for the ez-link card and submitting the Mendaki Loan Form. The Mendaki Loan Form is like soo complicated.Who else is applying for the Mendaki Loan ???? Not the grant tau... The loan...

I went to the Mendaki Mentoring thingy Gathering the other day. It was ... okayyyy.. We all played three bowling games for free. THREE! Then after that headed for the beach and played the most predictable game ever introduced to the face of the earth. Dog & Bone. Surprisingly the game was quiteee fun. The opponent was actually losing. But after Azrai'e accidentally grabbed a girl's butt instead of tapping her , they started winning!! I think Azrai'e got excited and then suddenly smangat to play.

So yeah that was the only highlight of that day.

I'm meeting Shaiful after this to accompany him go Bugis. Because i have nothing else better to do. And he promise he'll treat me if i get hungry. Thank god , cause now im starving and broke.

2006-04-02T08:33:00.000-07:00

Yesterday i managed to prank 4 people. ONLIEH. damnit. I only realised it was april fool at about 10 pm.One of the pranks was to tell qazim that Mr Eng masuk islam.

Qazim believed it . He told me it was convincing. I bet it was. I typing everything in caps lock. OMG MR ENG MASUK ISLAM. WHATTEHECK. SO UNEXPECTED SIA! WHATTEFOOK. THIS IS CRAZY. and he's all like HAHAHAHAHAHA . OMG!!! EWW.. HE MUST SUNAT.

Oh i used the same prank on Faizal. and he's all for visiting Mr.Eng's house and making him feel welcome and started talking about how converts find it difficult. Blahblahblah.

And then of course , we (faizal and me) decided to prank Azri who's a harry potter freak. A bigger harry potter freak than i am. Which i thought wasnt possible. We told him , J.K Rowling coming to Singapore. But its like we were the ones who were pranked instead , cause the effect wasnt what we expected.

Me: J.K ROWLING COMING TO SINGAPORE!!
Faizal : Omg !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (he's pretending he just heard the news lah)
Azri: there is an update on her site . u all check already?
Faizal and me : *blur*
Azri: The WOMBAT test
me: *wtf?*

so basically me and faizal were like "She's really coming to singapore?" But it turned out Azri was really talking about the WOMBAT test. Whatever that is. but he did say he believed us when we told him j.k rowling coming to singapore. I told him it was in The Straits Times and he really did checked the newspaper. For a really really long time. So yeah , the prank sort of worked.

I shall not say the prank i pulled on Liyana cause she'll kill me. Hahahaha. But yeah i got her to stop breathing for a while . =p

p.s: I wrote this while having stomach cramps so pardon if it all spells out nonsense to you.

AND HAPPY 17th BUFFDAEEE FATIN!!

2006-03-29T06:52:00.000-08:00

Today was a reunion lunch with Shairah and Hidayah. I woke up at 1pm to Hidayah's phone call. And this time i was trying really hard not to give it away that i just woke up. So ..

Hidayah: OH MY GOD. you just woke up?
Me: No.
Hidayah: You're lying
Me: *sleepy voice* no.
Hidayah: Anyway , wanna meet me for lunch this afternoon. Everyone has CCA except for me
Me:No.

but later on i confessed to her that i lied abt being awake.. See , staying at home for the past few months had made me a good girl. I can barely lie without feeling guilty afterwards. Im an honest soul now.

I decided to meet , Hidayah and Shairah , anyway. We couldn't stop talking. A reunion of the three musketeers. Yeah , we had a laugh remembering that Mr.Eng used to call us that. I almost forgot how much i miss Shairah's drilling on the juicy details of everyone's life and how Hidayah always think of the worst stuff to say.I know what i just said about hidayah is not exactly a positive thing. But she cracks me up.

Speaking of which , Hidayah figured it was her duty to tell me and Shaiful that one day we'll just end up with each other , yesterday.

Hidayah : You guys are seriously going to end up with each other.
Me: WHATTEHECK. (hid has said this before but not in front of shaiful)
Hidayah: Even fatin thinks so
Me: She does not.
Hidayah : Shaiful .. Raudah.. Doesnt that sound so right? What are you going to name your children
Me: FOR GOD'S SAKE WE'RE NOT GOING TO HAVE CHILDREN!!!

Im not saying Shaiful is repulsive or anything (NO WAY , THE DUDE'S CUTE =P) . but seriously , dating your good friend is just wrong. It breaks the laws of friendship.

Shairah and me relieved the time we argued because of an incident concerning me nagging to her as for littering.It went something like this

Me: Are you going to pick that up? *points to the litter*
Her: No. What you gonna do?
Me & her: *FIGHTFIGHTARGUEARGUE*
Her: Prude
Me: Bitch

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

And after that i remember i really missed not talking to her. because she was usually the one asking me things like How are you and him? What did you do? Where did you go? and i always had fun telling her all about it because her reactions are always very err expressive? But both of us, being the egoistic brats we were , refused to talk to each other for the whole of june holidays.

kids.

Its ironic how we were so mad at each other then but now we're laughing about it.

2 reunions in a row , im having a hell of a time. yesterday's was the moshies (Wani , Shida , Shaiful , Hidayah and later on.. Yusoff) , today the musketeers. Which reminds me , I HAVENT MET FATIN. whatthefish.

i miss temasek so much it hurts.

random picture. I do look retarded here dont i?

I feel like going to the Anugerah concert. LIYANA GO WIMME! i dont care if your mum says its a waste of money. We're going to be in the same building as Syed Azmir!! OH MI GOODNESS

2006-03-26T05:21:00.000-08:00

Okay as you can see , i've revamped my site. This layout actually has a concept. Which was to be to do everything my way. This blog is my space. And althought i rarely write personal honest stuffs , I still love my blog loads loads. Its a place for me to actually rant , bitch , make jokes. And for those constant visitors(if there's any), you might not realise it , but you prolly got to have a sense of what sort of person i am by reading my blog. Good , bad , or whether ur assumptions of me are true , i dont know. And that's what make it more fun. I hope you like me though

Cause i luff you.

So i hope that jusitified why my layout looks like it just came out from a horror movie. But between you and me , i secretly love rihanna's body.

It looks so exactly like mine

*Cough*

ANYWAY.. I HAVE PIXXIES!!

A picture after a whole day of cycling. Yeah , we're smilling in the picture. But really , our butts hurt like hell.

KRC3 nostalgia. Personally , i dont think i look good here but this is my favourite picture of KRC3.

Us and the trophy (is suaibah's hands) at the captain's ball tournament. This picture was actually taken with my phone so its a bit blurry.

My new converse sneakers. picture taken using my phone.

Okay , Nicholas Sparks is not making me feel any better.

[quote] the first time you fall in love , it changes your life forever ,and no matter how hard you try , the feeling never goes away[/unquote]

i am DOOMED.

2006-03-23T08:41:00.000-08:00

Everyone sees me as an emotionless egoistic bitch. Right? Okay , ive never been called all three at once. But yeah , I've been called ,emotionless , egoisitc , bitch on seperate occasions.Well okay , so I am flawed.

But guess what the emotionless egoistic bitch had done for the past dunno-how-long. She's been writing a lengthy love poem . In Malay.

OMIGOODNESS

Now , emotionless egoisitc bitch people wont do that would they? No they wont. They will prolly write about ..

What am i saying , they wont even write poems. Because poems are for emo people. Like me for example. So , i may come across to you like i dont have any feelings , for any other human being except for my own narcisstic self. But really , i do have feelings.

Just because i dont whine about my own problems in my blog. Does not by any means make emotionless. In fact , i do whine in my blog. I just dont sound melodramatic.Do i? Even if i do , i did on purpose . On entertainment purposes.

Now what on earth am i blaberring about.

Eh actually i like people to think im emotionless. Make me sound so cool and collected. Which i am of course. I am always cool and collected. In fact i hardly show any emotions at all. I express my views and principles , yes. But no , i dont express my emotions.

So , the purpose of this whole entry is to tell you how emotional i am and how emotionless i can be.

what in the holy heavens am i talking about.

In 20 years time when i read this entry I'll probably say "I was such a screwed up teenager"

HAHAHA. yes you were , Raudah-in-the-future .
yes you were.

2006-03-19T22:00:00.000-08:00

The Taliban Forbids Women to:
attend school
work outside the home
laugh loudly
perform or listen to music
leave home without a male relative
use cosmetics
visit male doctors
go outside without wearing a floor-length veil called a burqa
wear high-heel shoes
watch movies, TV and videos

If a woman breaks these laws, she risks being flogged or killed.

If i was a taliban women , i'd been shot dead in my bed a long long time ago.

On to other stuffs. Time for another video.

This one totally rocks. A video of someone imitating beyonce. A male.Damn he's good. But you can sort of see he has some trouble walking on heels.

He has smooth legs! Whaddaheck.

2006-03-18T05:01:00.000-08:00

Who would have thought that , out of all us (Alia , Fatin ,Shida , Wani, Shairah , Qazim , Hidayah) , Qazim is the first among us to have gone clubbing.Like , real clubbing.

WHADDA.

qazim wazim?! If you told me that a few years ago i would have thought you were on drugs.

Now ,Lets talk about love.

1. do u believe in soulmates?
Yeah. Someone out there is made for me.

2. why is it hard to let go of someone you love?
hormones

3. why do we cry after a break-up?
because you know , its going to be hard. And you know it'll be hard to forget him. And you will remember everything good that happened in the reliationship with such amazing clarity and start missing him. Also , you would want to forget him but at the same time you dont want to lose the memories you had with him.

4. who will you choose: the man/woman who is the center of your world or the man/woman whogave the world to you?
The man who gave the world to me. All girls want to be flattered.

5. are you good in hiding your emotions?
I can if i try really hard.

6. why do we need to love?
Because we're humans.

7. being single or being taken? Single

8. what's so nice in being single?No arguements. No worrying day and night on how to please him and make him happy. No feeling guilty what a bad girlfriend you've been even when all you did was sms your guy-friend. No a lot of things

9. ever cried infront of a bf/gf?
*shuffles feet* once.

10. most painful thing said by a loved one?
"You'll never change" when all i've ever tried to do was change. So now , we all learn a painful lesson today. Never try to change for a someone. Because once he already think of you as something , he'll always think of you like that , no matter how hard you try. Its hard to change yourself but its even harder to change someone else's perception of you.

11. most painful thing did by a loved one?
When he chooses to break up rather than explaining to me what was going on.

12. how do you cope with a breakup?
Who says i cope with it? But if you're referring on to how i restrained myself from jumping down the nearest building , then my answer is .... to list down all the bad things during the reliationship. This would have worked wonderfully but i didnt have a lot of bad things to list down.

13.describe love in one word?
errr..

14. what's ur ideal date?
by the beach. Wait , done that.
Night walk along singapore river. Done that also.
Okay.... eating in a posh restaurant in paris. =D

15. how do you spend a day with a love one?
i have my ways. *mysterious wink*

16. can lovers be friends?
errr. i dont think so. but maybe that'll change in the future

17. is love lovelier the second time?
i cant wait to find out.

18. are you the type of person who expects toomuch from someone?
yeah. very much,.

19. what things/qualities that deceive you the most?
im not easily decieved. chehwah

20. do you believe that first love never dies?
only Allah never dies. ALLAHUAKHBAR. Hahah.

by the way..... Fityan Ghufran won 3rd in the captain ball's tournament. go us!

its a start.

2006-03-17T08:02:00.000-08:00

MENDAKI WONT PAY FOR MY SCHOOL FEEES.

Bloody hell , i speak malay , i've been brought up in a malay family , i learn malay , i got Astar for malay in PSLE and I got distinctions for both malay and hml. So whyyyyyy wont u give me the goddamn money. I'll tell u why they wont give me. Because im arab. So yay to me paying $12,000 per year! Im not arab for god's sake. Fawzi Laza is the friggin arab. Siti Raudah is a Malay.

On to a brighter note...

Okay i dont have a brighter note at the moment.

I will hereby declare that i shall not marry an arab guy , so my children will get free education. Unless of course my husband is a rich guy.

And in the near future if i dont like my brother's girlfriends I shall tell her , if she marries him , her children wont get free education. I will also tell them that my brother sometimes doesnt bathe. I dont know if he still do this , but he used to.

bang bang.

belum juga kah kau menyadarinya
akulah yg pantas untuk kau cintai
di bawah langit biru aku bersumpah
diriku tanpamu apa artinya cinta

2006-03-16T03:14:00.001-08:00

Tag 7 people: Shida Fatin Wani Qazim Liyana Aimran Siti

Write 7 angry things:
*Loloq just pmed me random numbers on msn.
*I have soo much things to do
*Mats singing Minah Tudung song
*Bloody minahs
*I lost my nano nano
*No night cycling tommorow
*Malaysian toilets

Write 7 happy things:
*Bought converse sneakers at KL
*Captain's ball friendlies this sunday
*Singapore is a happy place
*Temasek poly orientation (Still havent registered yet)
*Three mat malaysia said that i was "CUN GILERRR" .
*Nabil's chubby cheeks
*Liyana will accompany me go check-up.

2006-03-13T08:11:00.000-08:00

I am not in my best moods at the moment.

I'm going kl tommorow.

*yawns*

I'll go shopping

Whatever.

I'll sleep in an air-conditioned hotel

Bleah.

I'll get to go to a theme park , mebbe.

So?

Today is my bitch day.. All i feel like doing is sulk and whine.

Okay , i admit , i havent finished packing. I told my aunt i have. because .. because i lie.

But today was a fun day. Spent it with Liyana, Nadia , Suaibah, Razinah , Hasanah at ecp. Which is why , i have no good reason to have a "bitch day" today.

Whatever , "bitch day" dont need a good reason.

And i do hate the mats who constantly annoy us by reciting the minah tudung song.

I hope they die in an elephant stampede.

And my butt hurt from all the cycling today.

Do you know , i feel sleepy everytime i come back from the beach.

Im going to miss ya'll

im having confused feelings of him

Why do i defend him when...

Izinkan diriku.. Meluahkan rasa.
Maafkanlah aku andai kau terasa.
Biar ku paparkan apa yang terjadi
Agar engkau tak unlagi.

Emo raudah.

I wish he wasnt so mean to me.

I wish he'd be there tommorow.

this entry is dedicated to three most important men in my life at e moment.

i hope i confused you

this entry was brought to you by a very distraught young woman.

Yours sincerely ,
a very distraught young woman.
Assalamualaikum. May you miss me so much , it hurts.
=)

2006-03-11T09:58:00.000-08:00

Picture post!!!

2006-03-10T04:38:00.000-08:00

Have you had a day where everything just seems so wrong? that the slightest bit of noise annoys you and the itch on your left buttock which on any normal day you would just scratch with no complaints but today its almost unbearable. Yes boys , welcome to the world of PMS.

Actually i think im just feeling like this because im still sick and also because i just woke up from a long long nap. My throat hurts and i keep sneezing non-stop. I hate feeling uhealthy.

Today wasnt so bad . I spent the day at pasir ris primary. Iman had this concert thingy. His class did a sketch on dunno what. I wasnt paying attention to the whole story. I was too busy looking at iman performing with utter grace and talent.

He was the tree.

Who liked to sway alot. Even its roots.

Go iman!

Anyway ,watching the concert truly made me wonder if my boy-friends have ever had to do something stupid-like for a concert. Like i know someone (i shall not mention who) had to be a squid and he had to wear a lipstick.

*makes straight face*

I know the stupidest thing i had to do when i was a kid was that i had to become the "ikan todaks" who attacked singapore , because my best friend , Hafiz Malik had stolen the role of hang nadim. I was actually supposed to be hang nadim. Bleah.

But no, i was the the evil fish.

Besides that , in primary 3 i had this role as a witch.There you go , I mastered the art of cackling at tender young age. Well at least i was one of the main characters in this skit.Primary 5 , i got to play a queen . Who only said like , one line. Because my husband (the sultan) took all the rest of the lines.

Jerk.

And i also joined the tamborine dance because i thought it was cool. And we had all these ridiculously bright costumes and bright make-up. I joined the art club and totally sucked. I joined angklung and surprisngly , I was good! I was the favourite student of the teacher-in-charge. Muahaha. I was a genius at shaking the damn wooden instrument.

haha.

2006-03-07T08:37:00.000-08:00

Fatin has made me wanna start blending again. Hahah. So I did. I made a new layout but there's a bit of a problem which i have yet to find a solution. White dots tends to appear on the blend where there is black and i have no damn bloody idea why.

Such a waste.Nevertherless i would like to show you the layout that "cannot make it".

((I have made you a thing of my past))

Its a bit different from my usual style because i wanted it to be. I already submitted this as an entry to a blend challenge and I hope i win.

I wish i can take a diploma in blending. I wish the design industry recognises blending. But they dont. Have you ever seen an advertisement using blends? Bleah , stupid people.

Sometimes my dad ask the silliest questions. If i didnt know any better he's just trying to irk me. Which , of course , something he has majorly suceeded. But i dont know , sometimes he does sound like he cares. So yeah , back to the story , my dad called me like thrice today and i didnt pick up the first two calls. Now , dont go on assuming what a cruel person i am. I just thought it was my step-mum , so that was why i didnt pick up the calls. My step-mum can be super bitchy sometimes. So i avoid her at all costs. Anyway , i picked up at the third call and found out it was my dad.

Ummm hoooray?

The mail had arrived and im guessing he already knew that ive been posted to tp-visual comm but he still asked me where i got posted to. He asked me why i didnt go jc , i told him i didnt want to , so I only put one jc choice. then i told him i was sick and he ask me , what sickness , i told him i had a fever and he asked me this "Why are you sick?"

I told him "I dont know , I just am." I dont know what he was expecting. Was i supposed to give him a detailed description on what goes around inside my body. What was i supposed to say ? "Gee dad , the germs that i caught from this stranger whom i met downtown at 6.58am last sunday went up my nostrils , down my throat , in my lungs , round and round my small intestines and..."

Okay im crapping too much.Im just bloody bored. Tommorow im going out with liyana. Yay. *Sticks out tongue to isa* haha. i am so matured

2006-03-06T23:52:00.000-08:00

Guess what, its the return of the extraordinary dreams. Yesterday i dreamt shida won the beauty pageant in tpjc and she was in a bright yellow bikini. Whoots , go shida! I miss your smouldering look babes.

Frankly i have nothing new to update because ive been stuck at home for the past two days because of an annoying fever. I hate being sick. I feel horrible and I look horrible. I wish i have something interesting to update about so i wont feel so horrible. But i dont have anything to update about. Therefore , this is horrible.

Loads of great movies coming up. So for those of you who owe me money , you can pay back by treating me movies. And please tell me Da Vinci Code is not M18 or i will be seriously pissed off.

I need to buy loads of stuffs before school starts. My aunt already promised me a new wadrobe so i have stylish things to wear to poly. Yeeha. Things ive already had in mind would brand new spanking sneakers , a light pink cardigan , black pants , pink bohemian skirts , bracelets and loads loads of stuffs. I can't wait. I dont trust myself to buy all of em now , i'd prolly destroy them all before school starts. So .. yeah .. chill raudah .. chill.

Aimran says my name is
Siti natalie raudah binte muhd fauzy lazy john keneddy
thanks. All i need to do now is get a new IC.

2006-03-05T02:53:00.000-08:00

Goodbye Photoshop 5. Now i have Photoshop CS.

*does happy dance*

yeah , at first i was pretty pissed off that the computer had been reformatted and all my files are gone! But now the computer is no longer lagging and my uncle just instaleld photoshop cs. Yay yay!

So being the photoshop freak that i am , i immediately begin to experiment with my new found love of my life. OMG , all the functions are soo cool. Much better than photoshop 5. Right now i cant wait to start learning more at Temasek Poly . I'm already begun my studying by reading tutorials from deviantart.com . I can't wait to get started. Especially on photography !

im so excited. im so excited.

*dreamy sigh*

I intended it to look like poster. You know , a poster of three girls looking at a poster. COOL RIGHT?!

We're colourful people.

Tried to duplicate the tomato behind us. but my face looks like im trying to fart while being happy.

Yesterday I played pool for the first time in my life. We sucked. Except for fatin. Fatin was born a Pooler. The rest of us .. *Shakes head* . Shairah looked like a pro though , except there were times when she said "if i dont get this Im the worse player in the world" And everytime she said that , she didnt score. Majority of the time , Qazim scored the white balls. Hidayah is like super confident but super sucked (Sorry to say). I mean im not saying we seriously sucked , we were just having fun laughing at other people's mistakes. And im just exageratting. We were actually okay.

I love to screw with other people's minds.

2006-03-03T09:23:00.000-08:00

Just got a haircut.

I love the hairdresser.

Seriously

Now i've got sexy hair.

2006-03-02T18:34:00.000-08:00

I am a Temasek Poly Design student.

God that sounds good.

However im still extremely disappointed i didnt get to go tpjc. Its this rejection feeling you know. From now on i'll be forever labelled as the girl who wanted to go jc but couldnt make it. Ouch. I guess you have to be careful what you wish for. There was this period of time where i was convinced i made the wrong choice and was hoping i didnt get to go to tpjc. But after crashing mjc , that soon changed.

I shouldnt have crashed mjc.

Anyway Sadiq was trying to convince me to appeal for tpjc so he will have a friend.

Him: You tell them you got extraordinary talent in malay
me: Eh kau buat klakar per?!

Hahahahha . I couldnt stop laughing at that. And by the way i never thought i would say this but OMG SADIQ SOUNDS SO MATURED NOW. hahahaha , go sadiq!

Im going to miss mugging. The course im going to will have no exams , just projects and projects. I got "Visual Communications" , the course i've been aiming for since last year. Even so , when i saw my posting results i was like "Nooooooooo..." i've been rejected by tpjc. Im a reject. REJECT. It was the only jc i applied for and they refused me. But i guess i should be happy i got visual comm , since im very passionate about it. For you information its a course of graphic design and photography. I'm just doubting my capabilities. Sure i can design and everything but im not that good. This kind of thing relies of talents and im not sure im talented enough for it. I just try very hard. Im not trying to be humble here. But i had always been lousy at art since kindergarden. I was always laughed at for my drawings!

The thing is , im not saying i would do badly in visual communication. In fact im confident i wont. What im actually concerned about is how well i can do. I dont want to be just okay , i want to be WOW! I want to make it to university.

Today i woke up at a worl record timing. At 9.00. Why? Cause shida called me. All i need was to say "Hello" and she was like "YA ALLAH , BELOM BANGUN LAGI?!" i guess my just-woke-up voice is very distinct until its recognised even though all i just said was "hello" . Yeah , my sexy bed voice. muahahah!

Eh people who going to temasek poly , holler!

2006-03-01T08:46:00.000-08:00

Crashing mjc had been a refreshing after zillions of years stuck at home. My actual plan was only to crash for one day. But hidayah bribed me to come for the next day.

First day equals going to khairul's house , this new friend i made. Its still hard to believe that i actually said "What? are you crazy?!" when they first asked me to join them. Going to a guy-i-barely-knew's house with 4 other guys. Whadda- . But at last , i decided to go after much convincing from faizal that we're just going to khairul's house for food.Anyway we went to his house and watched ... a gay movie, "Beautiful Boxer" . Of all the 831093821931890 dvds in khairul's collection, the guys decided to watch a movie about a gay boxer.

But it was a beautiful movie. And khairul is a beautiful host. ahem

Anywayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy... I was saved when Hidayah , Fatin and Alia joined us later. To which Khairul picked them up personally cause they didnt know where his house were.. I shall not talk about how i spend my day at mjc because , i seriously want to highlight the fact that I went to khairul's house.

Soooooooooo...

Second day. Which was today! Sat through chem lecture. Me and Hidayah spent the time passing notes. And i swear it wasnt my idea. In fact , half way i was telling her that she should pay attention but she's like "Nooo! continue on writing" So yeah , like i could resist that , i didnt even know what the lecturer was talking about. Anyway after the lecture , i teared the paper up into 8 peices and gave 4 to Hidayah and kept the other 4. We planned to tear the paper up into more peices and then throw em at two different dustbins.

Smart people.

After that , I spent with Fatin's group of friends.

I am in love with Victoria guys. They're hilarious .

I would list all the things they did but i dont think i have the time. And its 1.45 am. I'm tired and sleepy. This was just an im-not-dead-post

2006-02-23T23:45:00.000-08:00

I was reading through my archives back when i was still in sec 3. I think i'll paste some stuffs here.This is like super cool. People always say when you grow up and then you look back at what you wrote when you were younger you would totally laugh at yourself. Its only been 2 years and its still fun reading it all back.

stupid virus! now all my files are gone! damn arr! takder kerja per send akuu virus u jaberoni!

Hahah , i used to use the word jaberoni?!

And there were a hell load of entries about Pahang camp.

shida , ill be saving u from badak. AHEMMMMMMM! wahh dramatic. anyway i wont mind arr if she's (badak) sleeping in the same tent. as long as she doesnt sing.

raudah evil.

it was just sum stupid naive thing. which is pray for hidayah that she'll get sum money to buy camp stuffs. so me and hidayah went home and pray. see if it works. see the powerrr of praying. lol.then suddenly tadi , she got 250 bucks! i mean , i knoe prayers come true. BUT THAT WAS FAST! Anyway remind me , next time if i wanna pray for sumone else , make me pray for maiself too. coz now im broke. and hidayah's rich.

I used to spell myself as maiself?! *facepalm*

no wani's screaming for us to wake up , no sound of snoring , no hidayah saying we shuld sleep back , no sound of shida saying she didn't sleep all nite.

this entry was after camp.And made me laugh out loud. Cause of what hidayah did.Anyway the story goes like this. All of us were like sleeping together. We just moved all the beds together and all of us just squeezed there. And hidayah was like beside me. Wani was waking us all up and Hidayah beside me was telling everyone "Its only 3 oclock , go back to sleep"

Bloody liar. She didnt even look at the clock sia. But all of us slept back anyway.

The world just went upside down. I woke up this morning. no i mean afternoon. And i saw my almighty brother already up... Doing... HOMEWORK!

me: What are you doing?
him: Buat homework lahh..
me: no. seriously , what are you doing.

and he totally ignored me and continued doing homework.

boy , that is scary. anyway this was the time when i was still living with him.

for the first time in the history of my holidays , i slept early. then i kunci jam kol 6 , dah smangat smangat. and dah iron the clothes. But then , i overslept to go to skewl. great. why?

becoz aku kunci jam kol 6 petang.

Selengernyer aku!

At first shida played the banker (monopoly). i tell you she's a really slow and grumpy banker. lol. cause , if you get a 100 dollars , she wont give u a hundred bucks notes. she'll prolly give you a 5 "20 dollars notes". she's weird i tell you.

and i have a request to make to everyone.PLEASE DO NOT DO ANY HOLIDAY HOMEWORK!

its always the same cycle , Aim then dream then fail to reach aims and dreams.

K Lah i think thats enough. Dont want to bore you any longer. If you want to be bored just click at my archive links.

2006-02-23T05:40:00.000-08:00

Im feeling the need to rant my brains all over.

I've been watching tv a lot lately. I've been such a lazy ass for the past few days , it wouldnt be a surprise if i woke up one day and found out im a man. Get the feminist joke? No? That's cute. Anyway , my eyes were practically stuck to the tv screen as i watched "Teman anugerahku" yesterday night. I am absolutely in love with Azmir. If all the other guys had any talent for acting , i probably missed that. Because i was too busy admiring what a fineeeeeee creature Azmir is. His character was sooooo , whats the word to use , "Smooth". Eh but you know what , I still dont know the name of his character.

I have a lot of things to blog about actually. Like yesterday I just told my mum I broke up with Nassier and she gave me a hell lot of advice. It was almost like she really wants me to get back to Nassier. And i told her about me being labelled feminist and we both sort of laugh about it. She told me i've always been so hard-headed that it might come across as being domineering to certain people. Like i wanna be in charge all the time. She told me that , actually im all soft and sensitive inside.

I've yet to discover that.Im sensitive , yeah . But soft?! I think only my mum thinks that way. Then again , she knows me best.

Must dig deeper.

Anyway im totally loving making feminist jokes. Milking it up for all its worth , they say.I hope you guys dont take it the wrong way. I am still very much , boy-crazy. Because what is the world without guys. In other words , what is the world without heartpain and suffering.

Hahah! I can be so funny sometimes.

So after a long conversation of how i shouldn't be so hard on my ex-boyfriend who had just left me to suffer and die. I had another interesting conversation . This time with my long long long lost cousin. He's from my real dad's side. I used to be extremely close to him. but after my parents divorce , we just sort of lost contact.

But msn brought us back together.

Its so bloody refreshing to talk to him. He makes everything so perfectly clear to me. Like the break-up. Now im no longer sad , or crying or regretting. No, ive moved on. Yes , you better believe it. Hahah! So if anyone out there ever dare to break down my guard , like saying "you should go back to him" you deserve a kick in the ass. Seriously.Anyway , we both were relieving our childhood days. Like he was telling me how my dad always gave us teka-teki and firdaus(my brohter) always get the right answer. It goes like this , whenever my dad gives us a riddle , both me and fadhil (that's my cousin's name) would like really try to think of the correct answer. And every riddle , the result will be standard. The same. Me and Fadhil would give like possible answers and my dad will tell us its wrong. And all my brother has to say is ... "KAKI!!!" and my dad will be like "Betulllllllllllllllll!" like really enthusiastically.

I didnt really remember this so when fadhil told me , I was like "Are you serious!? Omg my dad was such an idiot!" then i ask him arr..

Me: mesti fadhil ngan adah bingit kan?
him: Bingit arr!!!

that made me laugh.Anyway i sooo miss fadhil a lot lot lot. We talked all the way till 5.30 am about a lot of things. But sometimes i feel soooooooooo kental when i talk to him. Im like a goody-two-shoes always covered from head to toe and my idea of fun is reading a book. And he's just graduated from ite and working at sentosa. In a BAR!!

sigh , and when i told him that i am a volunteer at a mosque I totally felt like the prude of the century.

2006-02-19T02:07:00.000-08:00

Today i had a dream so powerful that i only woke up at 1pm.

At the first part of it , I was with this group of voodoo weirdos. I wasn't sure how i got there. but there was a whole group of us in a very dark room. We were sitting in a circle and there was some objects in the middle. And this guy who seemed to be leader finally begin the ritual with "Here we are with the half a tissue in the middle of us---" Uhh okay , i think this is the boring part so I'll skip it.

The second part was WAR! Literally. I was supposedly a warrior , a hot warrior. Along with a 6 other women. We were supposedly the most powerful , most feared and most respected. Take Notice that i said we were all women. God , even in my dreams im a feminist. Haha. Anyway , back to the dream.

The war was the ultimate war between good and evil. I say this because , the ones were up against were monsters. Fugly monsters. They're giants and made of rocks. They carried sharp and heavy weapons. Which , actually wasnt neccessary because they could squash us with their thumbs if they wanted to. Anyway , it was obvious these guys were pure evil. They were snarling at us and everything. So yeah , they're the bad guys. And us , the women warriors are the good. I say this because , we were led by Dumbledore. I have no idea how the heck he got into my dream but he friggin did.

Anyway , I said this dream was powerful because of a number of reasons. It wasn't the fact that we were all women . No it wasnt that. That was just a mere coincedence. What made the whole dream so powerful was how the warriors/us handled it. We were minute compared to our enemies . But we held our head up high. It couldnt be any more obvious that we were afraid of them. Hell , i was afraid out of my wits. In my mind i was all like "How are we going to defeat this guys!" But we didnt show it. No , we didnt. That was what made us feared and respected.

I remember how tense everything were when we entered the battleground. I did some pretty hot moves man. I jumped and somersaulted over this really really goddamn high wall and landed marvellously and did this im-not-afraid-of-you-glance to the enemies.

Go me!

We were outnumbered , we were minute , we were at every aspect at a disadvantage. But even so , we were more superior. We felt superior. We knew we were going to win , they knew we were going to win. But i have no idea how we would have won ..

because i woke up.

You guys prolly dont believe me when i said this was a powerful. But it was . Because I can remember every emotion that was felt and every single detail of the dream when i woke up. From relishing the reaction of the enemy when i did a somersault in the air , to the fast beating in my heart when i knew the battle was about to begin.

I was sort of disappointed when i woke up.

Back to reality of real life battles with my raging hormones and teenage heartbreak.

I'll get over it soon.

Anyway I just want to thank everyone who had showed care and concern for me over the breakup. I appreciate it a lot. those who had tagged , pmed me at msn , everyone! I love you.But i have to make things clear. i hope that none of you are judging nassier because of my entry. Maybe i have conveyed him as a heartless bastard in the other entry , but he is not. Far from it.

But i do wish he was a heartless bastard so i can forget him more easily.

2006-02-14T21:56:00.000-08:00

I am officially mentally unstable at the moment. I have been cursing , screaming , crying , not sleeping , talking to myself. you name it , i am thy mad woman from pasir ris st 21. I dont even want to talk about it at the moment.

Anyway , something really just made my day.

2006-02-12T09:14:00.000-08:00

And so our reliationship ended just like that. I thought i meant so much more to you than that. I never thought breaking up would be this hard but it is. I dont know , maybe right now while i cry my heart out , you're sleeping soundly without a care in the world.

So thats it . Two smses. and everything's over. No explanation of what had happened. Just a hanging past. I know i was the one who asked for the break up , but ironically , I'm the one who feels like my heart has been torn open. I gave you a choice , either tell me why you keep pushing me away or its over. You chose to leave me. And it became clear to me , that you stopped loving me some time ago.

I know it seems very childish to whine about all this to my ever so public blog. But hell , give me a fucking break. Its 1.30 am in the morning. No one is awake. And tommorow everyone will be in school , and i'll be sitting at home still depressing.

But life moves on.

Anyway, I had to change my previous layout , duh. So i vented all my frustrations and disappointment into this layout. This layout was done in less than 1 hour , scribblings , codings , blends and all.No pictures , no textures , no brushes. Just me , my emotions and my photoshop 5.

and while im at it ..

SCREW VALENTINES . we're not allowed to celebrate it anyway.

2006-02-11T22:28:00.000-08:00

I never ever post lyrics in my blog . Put this song is really what im feeling right now. And i would rather post a song lyric than rant out everything and sound like a whiny bitch. So yeah. Its an old song and everything. Plus im not really a big fan of avril but her song lyrics always kick ass.

too lazy to paste the whole thing. so this part will do.

Are you aware of what you make me feel, baby
Right now I feel invisible to you, like I'm not real
Didn't you feel me lock my arms around you
Why'd you turn away?
Here's what I have to say I was left to cry there,
waiting outside there grinning with a lost stare
That's when I decided

--------

On to other things. that will prolly interest Shairah more than anyone else who reads my blog. muahaha.

DUFF: 'JOELWILL NEVER CHEAT ON ME'
Pop princess Hilary Duff is thrilled her rock star boyfriend JOEL MADDEN has given up drinking, as she no longer fears he'll cheat on her.
The teen singer/actress admits her lover was once tempted by female fans, but she is confident his new sober lifestyle has put an end to his wild behaviour.
She says, "Joel's so loyal. His dad left his family, and it has made him become the complete opposite.
"Plus, he doesn't drink anymore. I think there was (a groupie problem) when he was drinking.
"Now he's clean, so I don't worry about (his cheating)."

Pop princess . That cracked me up. Anyway Joel Madden is my husband. He just doesnt know it yet.

2006-02-11T08:15:00.000-08:00

I will not say what i got for my L1r5 . Because im ashamed of it. So , that is that. All i can say is that , i've got a distinction for higher malay. Which shocked the hell out of me. Its the only distinction ive got by the way. My best subject is malay. I can practically hear all the fityanees falling off their chair. They always said my malay sucked.But now , no one can ever say that. Because ive got a straight "A" record for malay. I got an A star for PSLE . an A2 for both Malay and Higher malay for olevels.

Which made me realise something.

Ive always been searching for an ambition. It had been very inconsistent throughout my whole life. A lawyer , a journalist , photographer , graphic designer you name it. And right now , I've just found my dream ambition. Something that i should have thought long2 ago.

I should be a malay teacher!

I mean , i cant believe ive never thought of that before. Teaching is fun. My whole family are teachers. Great teachers in fact. My aunt didnt even have a degree or a diploma and she became a H.O.D at damai primary school. After that , she went to broadrick secondary , and also got to be become the H.O.D . My cousin who's still in her early twenties , was a fresh graduate and got accepted to teach GP at meridian jc. Another cousin of mine was the top PSLE malay student in singapore and she studied in raffles girls. Anyone would have thought she'd be a doctor or something. but nope, she's now a teacher at cedar girls. My own mum have been teaching since 1994. My uncle went to poly and got to NUS and got a degree in engineering. Became an engineer and in the end quit his job to become a teacher.And these are just to name a few.

Its like everyone are friggin teachers in our family!!

And fahmy , mark my words. You'd be one too.

We should both be malay teachers! yayness. I can become the next cikgu afidah when im old. And fahmy can become the next SHAFIEE.

*Rolls on the floor laughing*

Anyway , im going to apply tpjc as my first choice. If i register for MLEP , I can get to tpjc (hopefully) . I hope i get to go there. So i can join MLEP and discover my hidden melayuness potential that i never knew i had.

Oh and on to another note. I quit my job. Don't even ask. Right now i have a stupid pair of heels which I only wore for one day (i bought it just yesterday) . Im not talking about those normal heels. This are in-your-face-and-dont-mess-with-me stilletos. Which is kinda cool. But i would feel so weird wearing it on a normal outing.

All this crazy people getting 15-17 saying that "I hope i get to tpjc" should just go poledance. because its making me nervous as shit. if u , getting 15-17 doubting to go jc. What the fook abt me.

2006-02-07T20:37:00.000-08:00

Okay , this is going to be a boring entry . Its just something i couldnt resist updating because its soo exciting.

I've got a new job!! Its not really official yet , i have to go for the 2nd interview today . But the lady which interviewed me yesterday say if i'm okay with the wage and everything , I can start working immediately. I haven't quit my pizza hut job though , just in case i dont get this post. My new job is under sales and marketing. The office is really cool. Almost all the people there are about my age. It was so weird to see malay guys wearing formally with ties and all. The only time you can see guys wearing ties and smart shirts is during prom.

If i get this job I am sooo going to buy one of those high class woman suits. Seriously. Some of the girls there wear them and they looked really good.

The lady that interviewed me was smoking while she did the interview. It was quite unnerving actually. I dont really like people who smoke . But she was really nice and everything. The smoking thing still bugs me. But who am i to judge. She is supposedly very good at her job and everyone in the office respects her.

The first few minutes of the interview went well . until i got hungry. And for those people who know me , i tend to be different when im hungry. In fact when im hungry i prefer to not talk , thank you very much. So yes , the next few minutes i fumbled with words and everything. Urgh.

wish me luck for today.

2006-02-05T21:29:00.000-08:00

I love it when nabil shits in his diapers.His facial expression is funny. Can see all the face muscles all tense up and he is seriously concentrating ! And he does this at extremely random moments. Like when he running around the house with me and he suddenly comes to a halt and .. shit. After that he continues on running.

Just now he shitted and then sat down. And then he told my aunt "Abil nyerr ahik dah enyek!" in adult language it means "nabil nyer tahik dah penyek!" or in english "My shit is squashed!"I couldnt stop laughing.

On to other stuffs.Yesterday me , suaibah , razinah , hasanah , nadiah , nabilah and fahmi all ate at the banquet at eastpoint. Yay to food!! There we were indulging in our food when suddenly we heard fahmi gasp. Fahmi was beside me so naturally i was quite shocked when he did that. "My tooth just fell off!" said the incredible gasping machine.

Muahahahaha! It took me a lot of self control to not laugh. Nabilah however was laughing out loud already. I seriously couldnt believe that happened. When was the last time you experience your friend losing a tooth during their teenage years. for me , never! Which was why i found it hilarious.

Pictures from netball practice

models for the ryc t-shirt. now , dont you want one!

Hasanah , Atiqah , Raudah = harharhar.
get it? anyway its supposed to be from left , atiqah then hasanah then me.

This is my sexy face.

anyway i just found out my brother is working at the long john silver in bedok. -_-

2006-02-02T09:53:00.000-08:00

"Imagination is more important than knowledge." ~ Albert Einstein.

Then im a friggin genius.

2006-02-01T20:57:00.000-08:00

Besides that im getting fatter and fatter. Nassier has also pointed out another attribute that i have and waste no time telling everyone this. That im clumsy. According to him , everytime im on the phone with him , I either trip on something or knock my head on something or accidentally injure my hand or legs. And also , everytime i go out with him , I will do the same things mention just now. Even though i cant deny all these (because its true) , I still wish he would stop mentioning it.

And i will not get fat , he just have to live with that information and not say anything when I eat.

I wish he'd mention other positive things. Like for the fact that he thinks my voice is sexy during the mornings. As in , when i just woke up. Muahahahah.

I miss him anyway. He's started working which equals to less time spent with me. =(

Anyhows. Yesterday i spent the whole day with liyana as per usual. Liyana one day we're just going to be sick of each other's faces. Seriously. I transferred the photos from my hp to her laptop using infrared. Will post them later. Which reminds me , I forgot to tell you guys that i have a new phone. It takes great pictures. I wont need to get a digicam now because i can just use my phone. It turns out really huge and clear on the computer. Seriously. And im pleased to hear that Hidayah wants this phone.

Finally something to make her jealous , instead of she making me jealous! *evil laughter* Actually i miss her and everyone else. I cant wait for olevel results. I know everyone's nervous as heck but im actually excited. Not because im confident i will do well , duhh , but because i can't wait to go back to school. I dont ever want to work again. I will make sure i marry a rich husband so that i will not have to work for the rest of my life.

Husband meaning nassier of course. There's no one else i would marry but him. hehehe.

2006-01-29T08:36:00.000-08:00

I am NOT in a good mood. In fact im not even sure i bother to write this entry. Maybe i just need to rant a little. Distract my mind from dwelling on pissy-fying thoughts. I miss temasek , I wish i was back there studying my ass off instead of working at pizza hut.I cant believe i just said that , but i just did anyway.

First of all , today was NOT a good day at work. Thanks to my colleagues. Im not sure if its just me or the girls really are talking behind my back. Maybe its because im insecure but i swear they really are.. They just have their own way of making me feel inferior. Most of the time , their ways includes , shouting , screaming , ordering , glaring , frowning or ignoring me. Bitches.

I am immensely suprised at the amount of patience i did not know i have. Really. Working at pizza hut had just made me aware of it. Or maybe it was the one responsible for developing it. If someone were to order me around before or make me feel like i was less intelligent I would have seriously kicked their asses. I have my own ego. But working at pizza hut , my ego had been brutally shattered , scabbed , broken and mutilated and all my colleagues asses are still intact.

Marvellous.

i can be so overly-dramatic. just trying to liven up my almost dead blog. There used to be so many interesting entries to write when i was a temasekian. Wasnt there?

Currently im hearing the sounds emitted by my brother who is in his deepest slumber on iman's bed. He still hasn't kicked the habit of muttering in his sleep. So far , i havent heard anything remotely interesting. Just grumblings and things like that.Just now he tried to hug the bed post thingy. Im just waiting for him to say something funny. Like my mum . I love talking to my mum when she's in between dreamland and reality. I remembered there was this once i was asking her for pocket money and her reply went something like "The horse is in the toilet".

Anyway I still think work sucks and im dreading to go there tommorow.

somebody please cheer me up.

edit: (thanks liyana for the attempt. you're the best)

2006-01-25T08:14:00.000-08:00

fityan ghufran crew at kak aishah's house. look at isa posing with his finger! He's like totally obsessed in showing off his mutilated finger (he's the one with the bandaged hand) . For those who dont know the story , he got his finger sliced during hari raya haji when he was holding the goat down. Someone mistook his finggy as the goats neck.

taken at hari raya korban. look at what they're doing to the goat! according to yan , this is their favourite kambing. WTH ?! dont they all look the same?Anyway this is Hours before the finger accident so you can still see isa's head posing for the camera in this picture.

I think i just made isa popular. He's appeared in three of my entries consecutively.

I've just received my first pay! Its supposed to be $300+ but $57 dollars went to my CPF account , so now I only have $210.75 . urgh

And What the heck is up with the 75 cents.

anyway , now i can buy a house $57 more expensive than all your houses.

F*cking yay.

2006-01-21T23:28:00.000-08:00

I cant stop laughing like shit.

Me:aku just dyed my hair pink!
Me:liyana dyed her hair lime green
Me:Style sey!
Isa:Bedek
Me: betol lah!
Isa:removeable nye ar
Me: no. kental sey. permenant. halal nyer dye
Isa:n nas noe bout it?
Me:blom lagi.
Isa:dier marah tak
Me:entah. aku blom bilang lah! kau rasa dier marah tak?
Isa:i guess so
Me:oh no!
Isa:ko takde keje lain ke??
Me:eh . hot per!
Isa:Haiz selenger2
Me:tapi ini stakat highlights jer arr. bukan the whole hair.
Isa:klu highlight maybe nas tak marah sgt ar
Isa:tapi aku rase dier tetap marah jugak
Me:eh. halal nyer dye per!
Isa:even tho its halal
Isa:its still contain unnatural ingredient
Isa:unlike Inai

BAHAHAHAH ! i cant believe that someone would believe this crap! isa , you just made my day. His conversation with liyana about this topic was even funnier! takbleh tahan. now.. for my next victim..........

hmmm

2006-01-21T22:33:00.000-08:00

Today is my off-day and im utterly bored at home. When im bored , i tend to search for things to amuse myself. This time i decided to change my msn nick from

raudah X with every broken heart we should be more ADVENTUROUS

to

your worst nightmare.

ITS SO BLOODY COOL. everytime i log on "your worst nightmare has just signed in " will appear on all your monitor screens.

*EVIL LAUGHTER*

anyway , for the first time in my whole entire bloody life , i am concerned about my weight. Dont laugh , shida , fatin wani farhan shaiful and especially fahmy. I am in fact , getting fat.

Nassier told me that all I do is eat eat eat eat.He said that everytime he goes out with me i get hungry and everytime he ask me what im doing on the phone , i say "Im eating" or "im hungry. and the other night he saw this pic of me on my phone and he was like "aiyoooohhhh.. u getting fat" . Which yeah i did , but on my defence , i was wearing baju kurung. Everyone looks fat in baju kurung!he told me to watch out for my weight. I was like what the kuntet?! nobody has ever told me that. they always ask me to eat more. Now , nassier thinks im in danger of getting boncet and fat , my dad told me i had gained weight, Everyone tells me i have chubby cheeks.

Watch out everyone , here comes FAT RAUDAH!

*dies*

EDIT: great my bibik just fried about 10 chickens wings. i just ate about 5. *dies* i wanna eat summore.

eh i just got another idea on how to amuse myself! i shall spread the rumour that i just dyed my hair pink!I wear tudung , so nobody will know.

k must try. then i shall add that liyana dyed her hair lime green.

2006-01-20T17:31:00.000-08:00

thats hamzah by the way. i wish i wasnt hidden from the camera. love this picture.

at the sungai once again. Im sitting on the float. So fun!

at ghufran mosque , ready to go through the krc3 experience.

The other day , two of the most hottest human beings i have seen came into pizza hut. They're definitely not local. Im certain they're hindustani . Man , those eyes. I wish shairah , alia and fatin were there , we could soo drool over the guys together. Especially shairah! They are so your type ! Hindustani , metrosexual looking , rich looking .....They're definitely well dressed.

Anyway , when he came in , sharifah was already smilling smilling to herself as she set their table. I was slightly surprised at that.She looks so innocent! Haha , this coming from the only girl who wears tudung in pizza hut. Looks can be deceiving. Anyway my manager , Durai was like "See ar .. sharifah , happy only see hot costumers!" And i replied with a "duhh.. they're super hawt!" haha , i can see him going "YOU TOOOOOOOO?"

Anyway , i think its about time i introduce u guys to the people from pizza hut.By the way 2 of my managers are indians, Amjad and Durai. And they're hilarious. I dunno why , i just think indians are usually funny people. Anyway this amjad , im not really sure if he's indian. He speaks tamil to durai but he speaks to the rest of us in malay. There was this time he told me to do something and i was like being blur like shit , and he said "Kau tengok , kau blur , aku tengok kau pon aku jadi blur"

style man , the way he speaks malay.

The other manager is filipino, Leslie. the intimidating and scary one. But i got to know , she's extremely crazy. She loves to sing to herself. And she says extremely weird things.

I will not introduce you to the other manager because i hate him.

My supervisor , is Desmond the cikopek. He's extremely horny. He loves seeing girls in short skirts passing by our restaurant. bet he'll love it even more if these whores come to pizza and seat on our cushion chairs and cross and uncross their legs. The other day there was this european woman , who breast feed her child in the restaurant. Desmond was in daze. This woman just lifted up her spagetthis strap top and breast feed her child. I mean , this situation is extremely normal. But u should not! do this in front of desmond the cikopek. Because he will undergo a series of fantastic imagery in his mind. Anyway back to the story , the woman was calling us and desmond was soo distracted he just walked away with this stupid grin on his face. So i had to attend to her.

when i got to the bar area, he was there looking at our schedule thingy , still grinning to himself. I was like talking to him and he totally did NOT answer. Atiqah was telling me "Terkebil2 sak mater dier tengok!" anyway when he walked away , I looked at the schedule he was looking at.
it was empty.

Durai was telling me "Raudah , you see lah this guy , he's still thinking about that woman"

eww

Yesterday at about 11.45 at pasir ris mrt station i realised that i had lost my wallet . Panicked like shit and called nassier. He hailed a cab immediately and picked me up and send me home. Gahh.. i love him so much.

The wallet has been found by this really nice makcik who send it to my home this morning. I love the world.

2006-01-15T20:18:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was a fun day at work. I cant believe i just said that , but yes i will say it again yesterday was a fun day at work. and somebody really made my day. He was just a costumer , but heck , I can't help it that im so smitten.Not in a love kind of way like how i am with nassier of course.

Anyway in pizza hut plaza singapura we have a lot of tourists coming to our branch. I usually get very intimidated by them . My english is crap . But these ang mos are probably the most friendliest costumers. They thank us for every order we sent them , they never raise their voices. They're always smilling. Hence , I get my fair share of eyecandy. The other day there was this dude with the coolest hairdo every. It was brown and everything and he combed it like really stylo milo! Hawt! But they probably see me wearing tudung and they think im going to burn and bomb their hotel or something.

So back to the topic. This guy who made my day. it was this teenage negro guy (i didnt get to know his name!) . At first I could sort of see he was staring at me ,but i figured that was because people in tudung are fascinating or something. Like , maybe he was asking himself whether im botak or not.So yeah , he finds me as fascinating as I find him. Anyway , i was clearing this table and was walking past his table , and he stopped me. So i was like "Yes, Can i help you sir?"

chehwah.

and he answered with "excuse me , can I know your name please?" I showed him my badge and told him my name's raudah. And he proceeded to ask me how old i was and everything.i asked him a few questions as well. Apparently he was an exchange student from the U.S.A . I wanted to reply him with something cool , show him how witty and charming I was.

me:That is so cool

I wanted to come out americanish but i sounded more like a spastique nyonya. OWELLS.

so yeah , our conversation ended with "It was nice meeting you" from me. I was like HELL YEAH, it was nice meeting YOU!

I just felt so flattered that he wanted to get to know me. I mean , Im this pimply teenage girl in tudung and ugly pizza hut uniform , but he was interested enough in me to ask my name and age. I wish we could have been friends. I think black people are cool.

However , I think i made a complete utter fool out of myself with my crap english. Seriously.